Type A planning with a Type Z hubby.... suggestions? - PassPorter - A Community of Walt Disney World, Disneyland, Disney Cruise Line, and General Travel Forums
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Type A planning with a Type Z hubby.... suggestions?
I hope some of the rest of you Type A planners out there are married to laid back men like my DH because I need some advice. He is dream to travel with because he doesn't get all up in arms over the "small stuff" that gets me running around like a chicken with my head cut off, and he can find a silver lining in any disaster so we spend a lot of time laughing no matter the situation.
HOWEVER, planning with such a laid back person is hard because it takes SOO much to get him really excited about anything in the planning stages. He's "fine" with everything. He'd never get upset about any PS choice I made (or was unable to get into), but by the same token he doesn't get all google-eyed over the idea of eating at V&As the way I do....he'll do it,he'll get all dressed up and enjoy the experience, but it's hard to know if it's worth the extra money when he won't get very interested in it until dinner night--I have to know 90 days out we're going to be $200 worth of excited over this dinner, or the Illuminations cruise...he just says everything I mention sounds cool.
Some of you may have read about our honeymoon turret debacle (I still can't bring myself to cancel the ressie though), but he's kinda put off by the GF now is more interested in the Yacht Club. I can understand the apeal there, but I keep thinking of the two full weeks we spent deciding to stay at the GF only to have him change it during a 10 min conversation. I am extremely excited about GF, not that I couldn't get excited over the Yacht Club I can get excited about ANY Disney options, but I don't want to change our reservation for him to just "like" where we're staying--I want dancing around with excitement and if he can't do that then I wonder if we should go with where I can feel that way because he does take his cue from me a lot of times.
He's suggested we just do whatever I want, but of course I don't WANT that I want us to both want to go to the same place. Do any of you have this situation with your plans?? I get excited over planning and he doesn't--I can handle that, but I need imput from him so that we're both doing what makes us happy, but he'd like it all to spontanously fall into place--do ppl really think that happens??? especially with Disney??
An example, one of the things he's expressed the most interest in is concierge service since we got spoiled at AKL in Jan, then he hears it is an extra $300 for our Yacht Club stay and he says we shouldn't do it because it's too expensive. How can he list it as a 9 on a 1-10 scale and then offer to drop it like it doesn't mean anything to him??
Re: Type A planning with a Type Z hubby.... suggestions?
I do remember reading about your "turret debacle" but I don't recall your final plans...sounds like y'all will be staying there for your entire stay. If that's the case, maybe you should surprise him and book the last couple of nights at the Yacht Club. If he is truly as laid back as you say, he isn't going to really push the issue of staying at the YC too hard because he probably just wants to make you happy. That's how my dh is....don't get me wrong, he isn't laid back, at all, but if he knows that I have my heart set on something, he will move mountains or pay (almost) anything to make it happen....Hey, it's your honeymoon, of course he wants it to be all about you, I'm sure. I think it would be a nice surprise for him. Who knows, it might feel like 2 honeymoons in one! HTH!
Re: Type A planning with a Type Z hubby.... suggestions?
I don't really see the problem here. You have a husband who is accomodating and easy-going. Just be thrilled that he wants to go; so many husbands don't even want to go to WDW.
I wouldn't necessarily equate "laid back" with "not interested". If he says he doesn't mind what you've picked out, he must trust you to organize the best trip ever. I wouldn't fret over something that isn't even there - too much wasted energy.
Re: Type A planning with a Type Z hubby.... suggestions?
I understand exactly what you are going through! My dh is the exact same way and it can be sooooo frustrating. Last year I just ended up planning the whole trip and he was fine with it. He couldn't even begin to understand how excited I was with getting CRT for the exact day and time I wanted!
My dh loves music and buys probably 5-6 cds a week so I thought I would surpise him by taking him to the Virgin Mega Store. So at DTD I tell him where we are going while we are in the World of Disney and he looked at the map and said he didnt want to walk that far!?!! What! So I said fine with me and continued shopping for myself!
Now we had a great time and plan on going back next summer, but he doesn't even want to here me talk about which resort, which restraunts etc till we get there. He has expressed a small interest in going to Universal Studios so he can ride the Jurassic Park ride, however I dont want to go there at all!
My running joke to everyone after we got back is "I knew dh was having a good time when he bought himself a Walt Disney World t-shirt" LOL!!
Re: Type A planning with a Type Z hubby.... suggestions?
My husband is also very laid back and let's me go ahead with ALL the planning. He never really shows any interest but is more than happy to go along with whatever I plan. He actually thinks my spread sheets and checking out all the boards so often is pretty funny.
For our next trip I wanted to stay at the Yacht Club. I asked my husband to look at AllEars and see where he'd like to stay. I thought for sure that he would pick the YC because we are sailors, live at the shore and our life is jamm packed with anything and everything nautical....so where did he pick to stay? The Wilderness Lodge!! I decided that if he was willing to go along with all my plans, restaurants etc. then he could pick the hotel. The WL was not on my list of places to stay but I'm warming to the idea. I know we're going to have a great time....we are in Disney after all!!!
I think maybe the idea of doing a split stay with the GF and YC might be a good compromise. Or, you can tell you husband that this time you'd like to stay at the GF and on your next trip you promise to book the YC.
Whatever you decide, congrats on your marriage...enjoy your honeymoon and have fun!!!!!!!!!
Re: Type A planning with a Type Z hubby.... suggestions?
Are you married to my husband? I understand where you are coming from!!! For me it is not so much the input of what to do or where to eat or stay, he will be happy no matter what I pick, It is having someone be as excited as I am, and to share with the anticipation in going. This year we are surprising our girls, so I can't even get the kids excited about going! I feel your pain, but it doesn't stop me from reading the boards (several times a day) and planning. I do agree somethings need to be not planned, but I just want the best trip since we only get to go every other year and we spend a lot of money to do it. Good luck with the laid back husband!!!!
Re: Type A planning with a Type Z hubby.... suggestions?
Thanks to those of you who understand it is about the excitement factor. I am so used to having ppl say "be grateful you didn't marry a difficult man or a complainer" I am absolutely grateful that I have a wonderful hubby, but it is difficult to know what is going to excite him 4 months in advance when he doesn't even know until much closer to time or the day of.
I'd love to split the stay, but unfortunately our week at Disney turned into 3 days on site and a week in a condo off-site. We are getting extra time which is fabulous, but we are going to get less time on property than we'd hoped because of the way taxes worked out this year.
I don't mind staying at the Yacht Club if he is going to get excited about it the way I am about GF. I think as far as suiting both of our interests, YC might work better for location to parks we're going to visit and theming; but if he is going to be as fine with GF as YC, then we may as well keep hoping for our awesome amazing honeymoon suite to work out there vs a more regular room at the YC. Also, I don't know where to go on the conciege factor....it's one of the only things he's mentioned several times as wanting to have, yet when he thinks of the extra money he says he can cut it out. Maybe we should go with concierge YC which still it cheaper than concierge honeymoon suite at GF.
Anyway thanks for letting me whine a bit...planning is no much fun to me but not when no one is excited with me. When I sit down with the books to talk about the options he's only paying attn for 15-30 min then he's done whether anything is decided or not. Then when I go to get a definite decision he's like "we already talked about that didn't we?". Making a decision holds no interest for him I guess.
Do you guys just listen to what your DHs mention in passing as serious interest and plan accordingly? or do you just do all the planning and make your best guesses as far as what he'll enjoy?
Re: Type A planning with a Type Z hubby.... suggestions?
My husband is kind of the same way. We leave in a week, and he didn't even realize we were leaving on Friday - he thought we were leaving on Saturday!
My advice is to just handle the planning yourself. If you need somebody to get excited with you, that's what we're here for! My husband never wants to hear details, he wouldn't be able to remember it anyway, so that's why I love the boards. Great ideas, advice, and plenty of excited Disney freaks just like me!
If you do want his advice on something, keep the options you present to him limited, and don't overwhelm him with everything that's available. Disney has entirely too much to offer. Pick 2 or maybe 3 or something that you think he would like, then briefly describe each and then get his opinion.
Best wishes on the rest of the planning, and I hope you have a happy trip. I'm sure he will appreciate all your planning once you get there and he sees how smoothly your brilliant plan is working!
Re: Type A planning with a Type Z hubby.... suggestions?
I just talk to my husband about Disney in short doses. If he is going to give input I listen because I am so grateful that he listened. Keep planning and good luck!!!
Re: Type A planning with a Type Z hubby.... suggestions?
My dh is the same way. He loves Disney, but doesn't really want to be involved in any of the planning. I really try to plan for things I know he'll like, such as going to ESPN at least once during our trip. I enjoy the planning and he really enjoys the results of my planning. It seems your dh got turned off of GF because of the hassle you receieved, but I bet once he's there he will love it!
Re: Type A planning with a Type Z hubby.... suggestions?
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My advice is to just handle the planning yourself. If you need somebody to get excited with you, that's what we're here for! My husband never wants to hear details, he wouldn't be able to remember it anyway, so that's why I love the boards. Great ideas, advice, and plenty of excited Disney freaks just like me!
Best wishes on the rest of the planning, and I hope you have a happy trip. I'm sure he will appreciate all your planning once you get there and he sees how smoothly your brilliant plan is working!
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My DH could not care less about going to WDW. He usually enjoys himself while we are there, but is absolutely NOT excited about any of it. He does get a little googly-eyed at the fireworks, but he's a pyro-wanna-be He says, "You plan it, I'll go along" so I gave up discussing it with him at all. That's why I love the Passporters so much!
Re: Type A planning with a Type Z hubby.... suggestions?
Your husband has that laid back personality but it doesn't mean he doesn't appreciate or enjoy your planning.
Talk a bit here & there about Disney, when he responds take note, but overall continue what you're doing. He wants you to be happy & just ask many wives here.... You are Blessed!
I'd go YC/concierge-surprise him! That's all he's really mentioned. Let him cool off about GF & when you return from this trip (while he still remembers what a great trip you planned) start planning for next year...at GF.
Have a wonderful time!
Re: Type A planning with a Type Z hubby.... suggestions?
I agree, my husband is type A personality but not regarding vacations to WDW. I love to (as we all do) get totally wrapped up in the planning down to each little detail and then watch his face as the plans unfold each day. It is a sheer delight to see how happy he is and how much he really enjoys just being there. He really appreciates the fact that I love to plan the trips so much and he doesn't have to get involved.
The 3 of us vote on the restaurants, each of us getting 2 or three of our favorites (depending on the length of our stay) but beyond that it is all up to me! DH likes the better restaurants, DS likes the fun ones and I love the Epcot eateries. So we get a little bit of everything.
We are all so fortunate that our husbands even want to go!
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I want us to both want to go to the same place. Do any of you have this situation with your plans?? I get excited over planning and he doesn't--I can handle that, but I need imput from him so that we're both doing what makes us happy, but he'd like it all to spontanously fall into place--do ppl really think that happens??? especially with Disney?? 
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My DH could not care less about going to WDW. He usually enjoys himself while we are there, but is absolutely NOT excited about any of it. He does get a little googly-eyed at the fireworks, but he's a pyro-wanna-be 
He says, "You plan it, I'll go along" so I gave up discussing it with him at all. That's why I love the Passporters so much! 
personality but it doesn't mean he doesn't appreciate or enjoy your planning. 
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