WDW touring with 2 adults/1 child About This Page:

[serenity72]

Hello everyone. I will be visiting WDW this October along with my husband and 11 year old daughter for our 1st time as a family. There are a few rides my daughter is afraid of, but my husband doesn't want to ride them alone using child swap. I refuse to ruin her magic by forcing her on anything she doesn't want to ride. I'm feeling stuck in the middle as I want everyone to have a wonderful time. How do other families of 3 typically handle this situation?

[GingerJ]

to the boards! That's a tough question you have there.

I wonder if your husband realizes how unreasonable he sounds on this one position? Maybe if you asked him sometime what he thinks the family should do on those rides, he'd come up with a solution...realizing that riding alone beats terrifying his daughter.

The other things that occur to me are just skipping those rides altogether, or bringing someone else along. That means you don't have this family-only memory, but maybe it will make this work better. A grandparent (or 2), cousin, or your daughter's best friend might do. We've gone to WDW with my parents several times and it was really nice...your mileage may vary, of course!

on this! Maybe someone else will have a good idea for handling it.

Ginger

PS: Is there any chance watching YouTube videos of the rides might help her get over her fears? I agree, forcing her to ride something that terrifies her would just ruin the vacation. Which rides are the worrisome ones? I'm guessing Space Mountain, Mission Space, etc.

[HiddenMickey]

Which rides is she worried about?

Show your DD YouTube videos of anything that she think sounds scary. It may help her to understand them better.

You may or may not think that this would work for you....
"If you are big enough to ride the ride according to Disney and anyone in our group wants to try it, we'll all try it. If you don't like it, you don't have to do it again." (Now, my kids were young and knew nothing about any ride, so they were up for this idea. It may be different if you DD has heard things from other people).

In 1999, our kids were 4 and 6 and the youngest could ride everything except Space Mountain, RnR, and Dinosaur (it had a different name then and a different height requirement). The only things they didn't like were Haunted Mansion and Tower of Terror. What was really surprising was that when we asked DD4 what her favorite rides were she said: Splash Mountain, BTMRR, and the ride in Mexico. We did all of those multiple times that trip.

Good luck!

[CinderAbby]

As a family of three, even with my daughter at 15, if it's a ride she doesn't want, we just skip it but for us it's easy because they're rides her father and I don't want to ride either. (Space Mountain, RnRC, Dinosaur, ToT, Mission Space). Plus too, there is so much to do as a family that sometimes you don't even have enough time to do everything.

I would definitely show her YouTube videos of some of the things she is afraid of and see if it helps. She may be willing to try it, she may not. If not I would just say to your hubby which would he rather see - your daughter happy and having a good time or scared and unhappy because that is what it may come down to. I don't know how much "clout" you have in your family but in mine, I've point blank told Lenny "if you want to ride x, then you can do it by yourself or you can keep this a family vacation by doing the things Abby wants to do."

Good luck - and FWIW, I'm with you on not forcing her on any ride she's not ready for even if it means she's gotten in a line and decides at the last minute she does not want to ride and you take the chicken exit.

[serenity72]

Thank you both for your replies. She's mostly afraid of the roller coasters and Tower of Terror. I'll take your suggestions about watching the YouTube videos, I think that might help ease her fears. Thanks again!

[serenity72]

Thanks CinderAbby. In regards to clout, I have "invited" my hubby to just stay home if he doesn't feel that he can compromise He seems to be getting with the program now.

[KimmyAnn1147]

I agree with the other posters here. In general, plan to skip anything she doesn't want to do.

Also, I think everyone deserves a break from family togetherness. See if your DH is willing to take some alone time in the parks, and see if he's willing to offer you the same. I have really appreciated an hour or two on my own, and 1:1 time with the kid is really special too. When we have gone as a larger group, we spent the AMs together and the PMs splitting, joining, re-splitting, each according to their own interests.

When I have toured alone with my son, it's been great, but one morning I was able to leave him with his dad, who was not going to the parks. I had a great 4 hrs in the parks and got to do the things DS didn't want to and wait in lines he would not have tolerated.

[JoanneS]

I wouldn't make your DD do any rides that scare her. Maybe you give Dad an hour or two alone to do all the rides he wants to do that DD doesn't. You could use the time to have a little girl time, either shopping or doing something "princess-y".

[HiddenMickey]

You know, I forgot to mention that ToT is one of my favorites. I was so bummed when it turned out my kids didn't like it. For several trips I had to ride it by myself while DH took them to do something else. Eventually they decided to try it again, and then I was a happy camper again. While I didn't like having to ride alone, it was something I wanted to do and had to do it alone if I wanted to do it. Your DH may find that is the case for him too.

[toddjodybrent]

Our family of 3 has been traveling to WDW since our son was 4--he's now almost 13. His tastes have changed over those years and is now willing to ride more rides. As his tastes have changed, so has our touring plans.

That being said, in addition to it being a family vacation, each of us also get some time to ride what we want to ride. I remember on one of our first trips, the husband and boy went to Tom Sawyer's Island as I wanted to ride Splash Mountain and they did not. Now, they both head off to Star Tours while I shop for art. Disneyland was our last stop so the boy and I rode Matterhorn Bobsleds, while the husband waited. And, our son used up all 3 Fastpasses riding Grizzly River Run by himself as neither of us wanted to rid.
Our son was also okay with his dad and I riding Tower of Terror while he waited for us as a designated meeting spot.
It's give and take--makes for an enjoyable vacation.

P.S. I've also found that what our son is seeking--more than avoiding fear--is some control. Having him help with planning and the "what shall we do next" helps to meet that need.

Have a great trip!

[MsLydia]

You are right not to force her. I have everyone fill out a "top five" list for each park and plan around that. Remember that you won't be able to do everything in each park so it's helpful to prioritize. We have had the best luck hitting those rides, first thing in the morning, when it's a walk on or using a fastpass. That way the reluctant ones can just wait, browse the gift shop, or hit another ride.

[dolphin041599]

Definitely don't force her. However the YouTube videos might help as well. And let her watch once you're there. Once she sees it isn't very scary, she might be willing to ride it. My DD16 still doesn't like Haunted Mansion, yet she will ride with me because she knows I want to ride it (its just her and I). But we only do it once, and I'm thinking of skipping it this next trip. She has, over the years, learned to love Tower of Terror! Now its a favorite of ours to ride together.

[serenity72]

Thank you everyone for all the very useful advice! You all have lots of great ideas that I will use starting this evening with YouTube videos. Much appreciated and I can now rest a little easier while planning.

[Huntermom]

i am a big fan of not being stuck to one another like glue. When we were a family of 5, we often split. NOw that DD and I often go together, we still split of only one of us want to do something.

I find our family does better with a little separate time. I also believe that kids have a right to say no but also that the need to understand the world doesn't revolve around them.

Have you and you DD done other trips with just the two of you? Howe long has ot been since she's been? KIds change a great deal as they grow and my 11 mine were ready for thrill rides although in the beginning I hated them. Over the years I have learned to go on all but TOT, Space Mts (did it one many years ago) and Everest. Not bad for a ride wimp.

[RogerRabbit]

There are 5 of us, and we run into who is going to ride what. We have come to a compromise of if you want to ride, ride. Whomever doesn't either waits or goes to a different attraction.

I don't think it hurts or changes our family time at all. It helps create different memories for everyone. There are times that my DW and I wait on a bench for the kids to get off a ride. I don't think anything less of the kids wanting to ride something I don't. It also makes them more willing to want to look through a store they may not want to look at, or see a show a majority wants to see.

Watching the rides on YouTube helps a lot. My kids didn't want to ride certain rides because of the name. They watched the videos and ended up riding them and loved them. My one son was 3 1\2 and rode Tower of Terror and loved it.

Michael