As of January 1, 2019, we have closed our forums. This is a decision we did not come to lightly, but it is necessary. The software our forums run on is just too out-of-date and it poses a significant security risk. The server software itself must be updated, and it cannot be without removing the forums.
So it is with a heavy heart that we say goodbye to our long-running forums. They came online in 2000 and brought together so many wonderful Disney fans. We had friendships form, careers launch, couples marry, children born ... all because of this amazing community.
Thank you to each of you who were a part of this community. You made it possible.
And a very special thank you to our Guides (moderators), past and present, who kept our forums a happy place to be. You are the glue that held everything together, and we are forever grateful to you. Thank you aliceinwdw, Caldercup, MrsM, WillCAD, Fortissimo, GingerJ, HiddenMickey, CRCrazy, Eeyoresmom, disneyknut, disneydani, Cam22, chezp, WDWfan, Luvsun, KMB733, rescuesk, OhToodles!, Colexis Mom, lfredsbo, HiddenMickey, DrDolphin, DopeyGirl, duck addict, Disneybine, PixieMichele, Sandra Bostwick, Eeyore Tattoo, DyanKJ130, Suzy Q'Disney, LilMarcieMouse, AllisonG, Belle*, Chrissi, Brant, DawnDenise, Crystalloubear, Disneymom9092, FanOfMickey, Goofy4Goofy, GoofyMom, Home4us123, iamgrumpy, ilovedisney247, Jennifer2003, Jenny Pooh, KrisLuvsDisney, Ladyt, Laughaholic88, LauraBelle Hime, Lilianna, LizardCop, Loobyoxlip, lukeandbrooksmom, marisag, michnash, MickeyMAC, OffKilter_Lynn, PamelaK, Poor_Eeyore, ripkensnana, RobDVC, SHEANA1226, Shell of the South, snoozin, Statelady01, Tara O'Hara, tigger22, Tink and Co., Tinkerbelz, WDWJAMBA, wdwlovers, Wendyismyname, whoSEZ, WildforWD, and WvuGrrrl. You made the magic.
We want to personally thank Sara Varney, who coordinated our community for many years (among so many other things she did for us), and Cheryl Pendry, our Message Board Manager who helped train our Guides, and Ginger Jabour, who helped us with the PassPorter-specific forums and Live! Guides. Thank you for your time, energy, and enthusiasm. You made it all happen.
There are other changes as well.
Why? Well, the world has changed. And change with it, we must. The lyrics to "We Go On" for IllumiNations say it best:
We go on to the joy and through the tears
We go on to discover new frontiers
Moving on with the current of the years.
We go on
Moving forward now as one
Moving on with a spirit born to run
Ever on with each rising sun.
To a new day, we go on.
It's time to move on and move forward.
PassPorter is a small business, and for many years it supported our family. But the world changed, print books took a backseat to the Internet, and for a long time now it has been unable to make ends meet. We've had to find new ways to support our family, which means new careers and less and less time available to devote to our first baby, PassPorter.
But eventually, we must move on and move forward. It is the right thing to do.
So we are retiring this newsletter, as we simply cannot keep up with it. Many thanks to Mouse Fan Travel who supported it all these years, to All Ears and MousePlanet who helped us with news, to our many article contributors, and -- most importantly -- to Sara Varney who edited our newsletter so wonderfully for years and years.
And we are no longer charging for the Live Guides. If you have a subscription, it's yours to keep for the lifetime of the Live Guides at no additional cost. The Live Guides will stay online, barring server issues and technical problems, for all of 2019.
That said, PassPorter is not going away. Most of the resources will remain online for as long as we can support them, and after that we will find ways to make whatever we can available. PassPorter means a great deal to us, and to many of you, and we will do our best to keep it alive in whatever way we can. Our server costs are high, and they'll need to come out of our pockets, so in the future you can expect some changes so we can bring those costs down.
Thank you, thank you, thank you for your amazing support over the years. Without you, there's no way us little guys could have made something like this happen and given the "big guys" a run for their money. PassPorter was consistently the #3 guidebook after the Unofficial and Official guides, which was really unheard of for such a small company to do. We ROCKED it thanks to you and your support and love!
If you miss us, you can still find some of us online. Sara started a new blog at DisneyParkPrincess.com -- I strongly urge you to visit and get on her mailing list. She IS the Disney park princess and knows Disney backward and forward. And I am blogging as well at JenniferMaker.com, which is a little craft blog I started a couple of years ago to make ends meet. You can see and hear me in my craft show at https://www.youtube.com/c/jennifermaker . Many PassPorter readers and fans are on Facebook, in groups they formed like the PassPorter Trip Reports and PassPorter Crafting Challenge (if you join, just let them know you read about it in the newsletter). And some of our most devoted community members started a forum of their own at Pixie Dust Lane and all are invited over.
So we encourage you to stay in touch with us and your fellow community members wherever works best for you!
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Ok I am shaking mad about this but I need to vent and get opinions or else I'll go crazy. My DS is 8 years old and plays coach pitch baseball which means the coach is the one who throws the ball and there are 12 players to a field (all regular infield & outfield with extra outfielders). His coach told the boys "if you don't hear what position you are to play then you will sit the inning out" so if the boys are not paying attention or are getting a drink and don't hear him, they don't play. A little background on my son, he has ADHD and does not take meds in the summer because he has a weight gain issue. He also suffers from migraines and seizures. He needs a little extra help now and then but not so much that he can't be a "normal" kid. I really don't like his coaching methods (not showing up to practice for one) since he tells the kid, don't do that, but then he doesn't follow up with this is what you should do.
Am I being overprotective? Is there merit in a complaint?
Maybe you could talk to the coach in private and explain the situation. He may be understanding and make sure that your son is really paying attention when he announces who will be playing which position.
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He actually expects 8 year olds to be paying complete attention all the time?? Really?? When DS was in Cub Scouts at that age, we just made sure there were enough adults to keep all the kiddos on track. All of them needed a bit of help from time to time. 8 year olds, whether they have ADHD or not, do not have a hugely long attention span. I think you need to talk to him and tell him while you understand his reasoning for this (help the boys learn how to pay attention), you think that he is expecting a little too much from such youngsters. Also, you may want to talk to some of the other parents about this and present a united front when you go to talk to him.
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He actually expects 8 year olds to be paying complete attention all the time?? Really?? When DS was in Cub Scouts at that age, we just made sure there were enough adults to keep all the kiddos on track. All of them needed a bit of help from time to time. 8 year olds, whether they have ADHD or not, do not have a hugely long attention span. I think you need to talk to him and tell him while you understand his reasoning for this (help the boys learn how to pay attention), you think that he is expecting a little too much from such youngsters. Also, you may want to talk to some of the other parents about this and present a united front when you go to talk to him.
Ok I am shaking mad about this but I need to vent and get opinions or else I'll go crazy. My DS is 8 years old and plays coach pitch baseball which means the coach is the one who throws the ball and there are 12 players to a field (all regular infield & outfield with extra outfielders). His coach told the boys "if you don't hear what position you are to play then you will sit the inning out" so if the boys are not paying attention or are getting a drink and don't hear him, they don't play. A little background on my son, he has ADHD and does not take meds in the summer because he has a weight gain issue. He also suffers from migraines and seizures. He needs a little extra help now and then but not so much that he can't be a "normal" kid. I really don't like his coaching methods (not showing up to practice for one) since he tells the kid, don't do that, but then he doesn't follow up with this is what you should do.
Am I being overprotective? Is there merit in a complaint?
I think you skipped a bit in your story - did your kid not get to play because he didn't hear? Or is this worrying that it's going to come down to that? (which is still valid, I'm just trying to figure it out.)
You could also try seeing if you could get your kid switch to another team, or if that doesn't work, another sport. I'm sure the 2nd suggestion wouldn't make him happy at first, baseball rocks. But if the system is geared against him, and you're stuck (which you may be, need to investigate), then change the game - literally.
Hugs to you both though. My brother and I both have ADHD, and I know that there have been situations like this where I needed to pay attention or I wouldn't get to do something. I don't remember missing out on much, as I was always quick to figure out what was going on, but it did make life stressful each time I had to figure it out.
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Explain to the coach in person. Email is not the way to go with such a sensitive issue. The coach needs to see that you a NOT "just another whinging mother" rabbiting on about "my special child"...email has no compassion!
If the coach was still insensitive I think you should move your DS out of the team. Your DS deserves to play in a team that is coached, encouraged and fair for ALL the players. The coach may react differently in person - Good luck!
I think you skipped a bit in your story - did your kid not get to play because he didn't hear? Or is this worrying that it's going to come down to that? (which is still valid, I'm just trying to figure it out.)
I was so shaking mad I probably should've gone into a longer explanation...
I have not gotten an answer from the coach about DS's behavior/listening skills. I asked him if it was but I just got an e-mail back about how great his kids are and that he doesn't think ADHD is a reason for kids to not play. Ok great, can you answer my question now?!?!?!? This doesn't add up though, with the whole you can't play if you don't pay attention.
I e-mailed the recreation department and will be calling the league director in the morning. I'm so steaming mad about this! It's been 3 days since the e-mails started, hours since the last one and I still can't calm down enough to sleep! This man makes me want to scream! I've already cried about this and my wonderful DS has given me lots of hugs and told me it will be ok, he doesn't have to play for the bully if I'll play with him instead. I had already planned on doing just that (he claims to want to be a professional baseball player!) so if he's ok with it I might just remove him from the team and enjoy the summer without the bully in our lives.
Thanks for the pixies and answers! We do cub scouts too so I know about getting the boys to pay attention and I coach soccer so I know about coaching too. This guy just makes me sooooo mad!
My three kids spent very little time in recreation department sponsored sports (we have a youth association but largely supported by the town but all volunteer) because when people are volunteers you can't control the quality of the coaches. My kids had a few wonderful coaches, mostly OK coaches and a couple of very bad coaches. My oldest son got turned off to basketball because of a really bad coach who screamed and belittled my son one day when his dad, who was an assistant coach was not able to attend the practice. He had done it to other kids before that say but never DS.
My suggestion is to have your child play either at a Y or Boys and Girls Club where they have paid staff. They may even have classes that offer more one on one than a team does.
The other thing I have learned is there are adult issues and kids issues. You have already shared too much information with your son. He should not be talking about the "bully coach" and I don't think he can play for him now. I don't think the coach is a bully-just someone with firm standards and expectations. He may have found this is the way that he can get the kids to focus (I remember t-ball games where half the team was writing in sand with twigs). One of the things all kids needs to learn is how to work with their deficits (all kids have some). Your son will face others in life that have a different philosophy from you and learning to cope with all kinds of people is the best lesson kids can learn.
I actually don't think the coach is being harsh with the kids. He probably spends less time trying to get them to pay attention and actually teaching them something. I'll bet most of the kids don't sit out more than one game.
Can you ask the next coach if you can sit near your son for the first few games and help him learn to know when to pay attention.
I also think that you might have done better with a face to face conversation with the coach. Now that there have been what sounds like many emails, it may be too late for the same impact.
Huntermom brings up many good points, but one of the most important is that this is an adult issue and you probably shouldn't be sharing quite so much with your son about the coach.
It is hard to tell from the info you have given what exactly happened. that things work out for your son.
It sounds like the coach has brought out the mama tiger in you. It happens to me, too. Just take a deep breath before you do anything else. Yes, I think talking to the coach might have worked better, but if you were angry to begin with, maybe not.
If his coaching style is listen or don't play, then wouldn't it be a little odd for him to change it to, listen or don't play, except for ***. Wouldn't that make your child stick out as being different?
I think that you have two choices here: stick with the team and let your DS work it out for himself. He will either learn to listen in order to play, or he'll stay on the bench and cheer for his friends. If he wants to be a baseball player, he will need to be able to listen to the coach or he's going to be traded a lot (Manny can only be Manny for so long before he gets the boot.) The second choice is to remove him from the program and try something else. It may not seem fair, but he might as well learn now, that the world isn't always fair.
My three kids spent very little time in recreation department sponsored sports (we have a youth association but largely supported by the town but all volunteer) because when people are volunteers you can't control the quality of the coaches. My kids had a few wonderful coaches, mostly OK coaches and a couple of very bad coaches. My oldest son got turned off to basketball because of a really bad coach who screamed and belittled my son one day when his dad, who was an assistant coach was not able to attend the practice. He had done it to other kids before that say but never DS.
My suggestion is to have your child play either at a Y or Boys and Girls Club where they have paid staff. They may even have classes that offer more one on one than a team does.
The other thing I have learned is there are adult issues and kids issues. You have already shared too much information with your son. He should not be talking about the "bully coach" and I don't think he can play for him now. I don't think the coach is a bully-just someone with firm standards and expectations. He may have found this is the way that he can get the kids to focus (I remember t-ball games where half the team was writing in sand with twigs). One of the things all kids needs to learn is how to work with their deficits (all kids have some). Your son will face others in life that have a different philosophy from you and learning to cope with all kinds of people is the best lesson kids can learn.
I actually don't think the coach is being harsh with the kids. He probably spends less time trying to get them to pay attention and actually teaching them something. I'll bet most of the kids don't sit out more than one game.
Can you ask the next coach if you can sit near your son for the first few games and help him learn to know when to pay attention.
Quote:
Originally Posted by DisneyDana
I think all children should have to follow the same rules. If a child needs special treatment, then I think he should be playing on a special needs team. I don't think the coach in this situation should be expected to have to show exceptions to any one child...he is not coaching a special needs team he probably got tired of having to single out one or two kids for not paying attention and then came up with this rule. It's not fair to the other kids who are there to pay attention to have to wait around on the other kids that are off drawing in the sand with twigs like Huntersmom said. lol Instead of getting all upset about this kind of thing, it seems like a better choice just to let him play with kids that are more like him where the coach expects this kind of thing and is more sympathetic, but if you want your child to do "normal" things like you stated in your post, then you really have to expect him to follow the rules just like everyone else.
I agree with both HuntersMom and DisneyDana on this one. The only exception IMO is if the child were deaf, and literally couldn't hear the coach. This is one example of a learning experience for your child, the world isn't always going to bend to what he needs. It's nice if you get a coach who is willing to work with your child, but it's not something that can be expected unless like Dana said, he is participating on a special needs team.
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