A sprinkling of pixie dust please... About This Page:

[AuntKat]

My dad had his leg amputated this past week as a complication of diabetes. He also has serious heart problems (also complicated by diabetes). He is recovering fairly well, but has a long road ahead. Building strength up just to move himself from bed to chair, etc. is going to be a major undertaking. My sister and I have had a Disney/beach vacation planned for a year now (going at the end of July), and we do not know if we will actually be able to go. I'm not trying to be selfish (I'm sure that is how it sounds), but it has been a very difficult year and I really want to get away from it all - if even for just a little while. Some prayers and pixie dust for a successful recovery and therapy would really be appreciated. Also, if any of you have gone through something like this and can give advice, that would be appreciated too. Two weeks ago my dad was still able to walk around with a walker. How quickly life throws curve balls.
Thanks,
Kat [img]images/icons/frown.gif[/img]

[tiggerific]

Kat, I'm sending lots of Pixie Dust your way! My best friend lost both of her parents in the last two years and it was so painful to watch her go through everything and know that you can't take the pain away. I think you should talk with your dad and see how he feels about it. WDW will always be there, he won't. On the other hand, you cannot continuously put yourself under heavy stress without a break. Although you have a responsibility to your dad, you also have a responsibility to take care of yourself. In the long run you will do no good for anyone if you are so stressed out that you can't think. If his outlook is good and you won't have an awful time worrying take the vacation! You can always come back quickly if you need to. Sorry if I'm overstepping bounds, I truly wish you the best. Hang in there! [img]images/icons/smile.gif[/img]

[Snapple]

My thoughts, prayers, and pixie dust are with you! I know how you are feeling! Keep a positive attitude even in the darkest times, it will not only help you but also your dad.

[debe]

You need a little more than a dusting of Pixie Dust sent your way! I agree with tiggerific. Talk to your dad about your feelings and I am sure things will work out for all of you. The end of July is still far enough away to allow time for healing.

Thoughts and prayers for all especially your dad. Keep thinking positive [img]images/icons/smile.gif[/img]

[Wild4Diz]

AuntKat -

I can sympathize with you. At about this time last year my mom got very sick and wound up in the hospital with major surgery and memory loss, etc... I live with my parents at 27 so that I can help them out and be together with them and at the time this happened I was on the other side of the country for business. I rushed back the next day and I wasn't sure I was going to make it back in time to say goodbye if I needed to. Thankfully I made it back and slowly she started getting better. My sister had a trip to WDW and Disney Cruise scheduled for two weeks after this happened and she wasn't sure what to do. My dad and I talked her in to going because she had never been and it was a once in a lifetime trip. She was very unsure about leaving and I'm not sure I could have made the decision. She went on the trip had a great trip and we kept in touch via cell phone often. She knew she could always hop a plane back home if she needed to.

It's a very personal decision to make, but I agree with the other postings that you should talk to your dad about what he thinks. His spirits and well wishes would certainly make for a more relaxing vacation if you plan on going.

I just had an uncle go through something similar. He was a pilot for the Air Force and he didn't want to be grounded so he didn't take care of his diabetes for years. This eventually caught up with him and it started with kidney problems, led to minor amputations of toes and fingers, then a leg and ended with heart failure. I cannot offer you any words of comfort here, I can only tell you to be there when your dad needs you and know that he loves you. It will be a long road ahead, but I have known other people that have gone on to live happy lives after an amputation.

I wish I had better answers for you and I apologize if I sounded to preachy. Good luck in your decision and I hope things work out for the best.

[Teresa]

AuntKat-
I know what you are going through, to some extent. My dad also has diabetes and heart failure due to the diabetes. There have been a few times we thought he would lose his legs. There are a lot of other medical problems he has that were supposed to kill him 30 years ago.
I have had to make the decision on occasion to leave his bed-side for "fun" reasons. We have both always been glad of this, me, because I got away from the stress, him, because he knew I was enjoying life and able to come back and tell him about what I had done.
Ask your Dad and sister what they would like to do. Maybe you could go for a shorter period of time, or arrange a specific time to call each day or two.
Sending your entire family lots of love and pixie dust for your Dad's rehab.

[All Ears]

Kat,
I am sending you lots of well wishes & pixie dust to help you & your family get through this new challenge.
Although I cannot say I fully know what you are going through -- I can say that life certainly threw my family a curve ball on 2/22/01, after my brother's automobile accident. He was not expected to even live, but he did. He is now paralyzed from the waist down.
Since then, things have been "different," and the stress level is certainly up for all of us. What I have learned from all of this, is that I cannot stop living my life. By this, I mean you gotta keep your life as "normal" as possible for your own sanity. Of course, you will be helping out where ever you can/whenever you can -- but you also need to do things for you. I have seen firsthand what happens to my family members when they stopped living for themselves -- they become lifeless, worn-out, stressed-out individuals.
It is NOT selfish to think of yourself. Your Dad would not want you to shake-up your life, I bet he wants you to be happy & go on that trip. Only you can decide what you need to do, but if his condition looks good & he is in stable health -- then go for it. You can always hire "home health personnel" to come check-in on him, etc.
If you want to talk, please feel free to e-mail me. It is a very "new" situation to all of your family members, so it will take time to adjust. That is normal. Just try to keep a positive attitude and go on living as "normally" as possible, ok?
Thinking of you,
All Ears (Michelle) [img]images/icons/smile.gif[/img]

[MrsPotts]

Hi Kat,

I don't have any words of wisdom for you, but have a similar situation.

Last March my sis and I planned a trip for our parents to WDW, and well, we just couldn't NOT go, so we went too. The trip was for mid-July.

In mid-June, after several years of my grandfather's health and mind deteriorating, he was put in a nursing home. Well, after much debate, mom and dad left a few weeks early to help grandma, and make sure everything was going as smooth as possible. Sis and I left a few days before our check-in date and drove to FL. See, my grandparents live about 1 hour from Orlando.

Well, when we arrived at grandma's we were quickly ushered into the car and were off to make one of the hardest visits I've ever had to make. Thankfully, it was one of grandpa's 'better' days, but to see him so sick was heartwenching. We all debated cancelling our trip both before and after we went to visit grandpa. Both he and grandma insisted that we go. We left with heavy hearts, but with well wishes.

After the several years of watching him slowly decline, it was a much needed trip, and we all had a great time. Knowing we went with his 'blessing' helped. And their was no where else on this earth that could have helped us to deal with what we were going thru. See, in WDW, the magic was infections, and brought some peace to our crazy lives.

Talk to your dad and see what he feels. It may make all the difference to your decision. Also, have you thought about may be cutting the trip a day or two short? That way you can still go, but aren't gone as long.

Lots of pixie dust and prayers to you and your family.

[castlecat]

Dear AuntKat,

I just wanted to say that my thoughts are with you. I will light a candle for your family.

[Wild4Diz]

It continues to amaze me that there is so much compassion on these boards. Everyone is so caring and giving and as I read these posts it makes me realize that what I have in my life is special and I hope that each of you knows how special you are.

My dad has been disabled since the year I was born and we have been told all along that he won't make it much longer, etc... My mom and I were talking tonight and we were reminiscing about the past. We both agreed that we have had a happy life with my dad and we feel that he is greatful. Imagine how long this 27 years would have been for him if we all would have given up and not continued to live our lives. He would have missed camping trips, fishing trips, Disneyland and I'm proud to say WDW as well.

Good luck in your decision and remember that we all know how much magic there is at WDW, it may be just what you need to lift you and your sister's spirits.

[MouseTyme]

Aunt Kat,

Sending Pixie Dust to your dad, you & your family. It can be a tough road. Keep your chin up.

[m_green]

AuntKat-

I agree with the other posts here, I would suggest that you and your sister talk with your dad.

We were in a similar situation, kind of. Unfortunately, we never did have to make the decision of whether to go or not. My father in law was diagnosed with cancer in February of 2000, and we had a family trip planned for November of 2000. That was cancelled, and my DH and our kids planned to go in September of 2000. We talked a lot about whether we should go or not. We never did have to make that decision as we lost my FIL a year ago today.

Our final decision though would have been based on how he was doing, and how both him and my MIL felt about us going.

Hope this helps some. I'm sending you lots of Pixie Dust and prayers.

[GoofyKids123]

Dear AuntKat,

I went through a similar situation a little over a month ago. My mother had her right leg amputated due to complications with diabetes and poor circulation. At the time, my family was scheduled for a trip to Myrtle Beach for a mini-vacation and retreat. I drove the 5 hours to be with my mother, while my husband took the kids to Myrtle Beach. I have 2 sisters and 2 brothers who were already there with my mother. As the middle child, somehow I've always been 'in charge' where my parents' welfare was concerned. In fact, after my father passed 4 years ago, no one moved a muscle to make arrangements until I arrived. At any rate, I spent the night with my mother in the hospital after her surgery, brought her home from the hospital and took care of her almost single-handedly for the next 2 weeks while my siblings took a 'hands off' approach. I was glad to do whatever I could for her, but I also realized that it is both physically and emotionally draining. Even though your father's surgery was a week ago, I'll bet you can already see progress that he's made. Continue to monitor his progress and definitely talk to him about how you feel. I agree that your going on the trip with his blessing would beneficial. I do not think you're being selfish. Home health care nurses and physical therapists visited my mother everyday. It may be hard to envision right now, but by the end of July, your father will probably be able to maneuver himself in and out of a wheelchair with ease. Consider hiring a private duty nurse if you plan on going on your trip and check on him regularly. My prayers are with you and your family. [img]images/icons/smile.gif[/img]