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It's time to move on and move forward.

PassPorter is a small business, and for many years it supported our family. But the world changed, print books took a backseat to the Internet, and for a long time now it has been unable to make ends meet. We've had to find new ways to support our family, which means new careers and less and less time available to devote to our first baby, PassPorter.

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If you miss us, you can still find some of us online. Sara started a new blog at DisneyParkPrincess.com -- I strongly urge you to visit and get on her mailing list. She IS the Disney park princess and knows Disney backward and forward. And I am blogging as well at JenniferMaker.com, which is a little craft blog I started a couple of years ago to make ends meet. You can see and hear me in my craft show at https://www.youtube.com/c/jennifermaker . Many PassPorter readers and fans are on Facebook, in groups they formed like the PassPorter Trip Reports and PassPorter Crafting Challenge (if you join, just let them know you read about it in the newsletter). And some of our most devoted community members started a forum of their own at Pixie Dust Lane and all are invited over.

So we encourage you to stay in touch with us and your fellow community members wherever works best for you!

Best wishes for a wonderful and magical new year!

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Old 03-10-2013, 10:17 PM   #1
Teresa
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How Self-Involved are You????

First, I wasn't there - DDs (all 3 were, though - and I got the same story from each of them, separately)Long story short, my niece who had a miscarriage last year is pregnant right now. She's expecting in June. Her baby shower was yesterday, where it was stated she is hoping to have the baby (even if she has to schedule an induction) on May 28, her mother's birthday. Her mother, DH's sister, talked about how she was born on her uncle's birthday - and both of her girls (the pregnant one and her sister) were born on the same day, 4 years apart. How cool would it be to continue the tradition by having the baby on Sis-in-law's b-day.
And that's when things went bad. DDs ALL looked at SiL and said "That's Kathryn's b-day too" (if you don't know, Kathryn is my middle DD). SiL evidently said something along the lines of "reallY?" and the girls said "Yes, really". Response? "Huh" (the girls say the look and the expression were something lines of "No, I don't believe you. Noone would dare to be born on my b-day and already take my grandson's future birthday."
I am upset. The girls already had some problems feeling welcomed, due to some long, complicated history that truly IS a reason to have issues! This just kind of tops it. I know all of my nieces' and nephew's birthdays. (SiL will be 53 this year - is 33 years older than Kathryn. She's also 33 years younger than her uncle. Easy to add.)
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Old 03-11-2013, 01:33 AM   #2
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Doesn't surprise me, but does make me ticked off.
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Old 03-11-2013, 12:05 PM   #3
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I can tell you within a day or two all my nieces' and nephews' birthdays but cannot guarentee the exact date. I know none of my relatives could tell you mine, especially on my father's side where there were close to 30 first cousins. So I don't think you should be upset at the not knowing. The reaction was a little less than polished but some people aren't that quick when given unexpected information.

I was hurt when my nephew didn't seem to know my DD's name when she was around 8, he 15 but than I realized that the adults hadn't done a good job of keeping the kids connected after nephew's parent's divorced.

My MinLaw made up a card with all six of her grandchildren's birthdays and passed them out to her kids and their spouses. I had to laugh as I had given birth to 3 of the 6. Maybe you could give calendar with birthdays marked on it, if it means so much to you.

I agree, don't sweat the small stuff. And let you DD know as she gets older, lots of people will not know her birthday.
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Old 03-11-2013, 03:13 PM   #4
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umm... I have images in my head of a very self centered family I know and am about to become 'related' to... I know it hurts, but try to let it go! (Something I'm saying to myself a lot lately!!) Oh and for the record, I can tell you all my nieces and nephews and great nephews birthdays to the year and day too! They only ones I mix up are my mother (shhhh don't tell!) and cousin because they are a day apart, my cousins 2 daughters (a day apart!) and my sister and BiL (a day apart!) yup a running theme!
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Old 03-11-2013, 05:53 PM   #5
Teresa
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Originally Posted by DisneyDana View Post
I'm not sure I get what you're saying here, but all I can add is don't sweat the small stuff. I'm taking it that you're upset because some other family member seemed miffed that your daughters birthday is on the same day as her kids? So what? that is sooo out of anyone's control that it shouldn't even register on your irritation meter. you can't fix stupid and it's allll over the place.
What upset me was finding out that my SiL, who turned 33 the day MY DD was born, and her uncle turned 66 the same day totally blanked my DD's b-day was the same day as hers. And then seemed a little put out because it wouldn't just be a special day for her and her grandson (and no-one else!). Now, I know the chances of her grandson being born on that would ordinarily be low, but this is a woman who scheduled her c-section for her youngest so it would be on her oldest child's 4th b-day!! And this is the niece that does not cope well with any adversity or not having things scheduled. Growing up, she even had bathroom times scheduled! I doubt she's going to let nature take it's course.

As I said, my DDs already felt a little unwelcome, due to prior issues. Having her aunt forget her b-day was upsetting to DD Kathryn. Of course, I doubt she knows the other kids' b-days either! (DD Lauren was born the day before the OTHER aunt's b-day, Step-DD Candi was born on Grandma's b-day, Step-son J.R. and another niece share the same b-day just 15 years apart, and DH's uncle and an aunt died on DD Samantha's b-day a few years apart)


BTW - I am better today. Yesterday I was very angry/upset over this, partly because I was going on 36 hours of awake!! I think I need to be forbidden the computer when I'm sleepy. I either get whiney or witchy. Neither is good.
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Old 03-11-2013, 06:09 PM   #6
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I think I need to be forbidden the computer when I'm sleepy. I either get whiney or witchy. Neither is good.
Me too!!! Except then I'd never be allowed on the computer as I am always tired!! (And right now in pain, so in pain + tired makes me constantly witchy. Plus once a month - or according to my DH 3 weeks out of the month excessively 'hormonal'! )

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Old 03-11-2013, 10:55 PM   #7
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For the record, I know the months of nieces and nephews birthdays but not the actual dates. I do not know my in-laws birthdays either. I do good to remember my 5 kids and my 4 (almost 5)grandkids.
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Old 03-11-2013, 11:50 PM   #8
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I can see your point and understand why your DD was upset. The people that matter most are the ones that will remember!
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Old 03-14-2013, 12:35 PM   #9
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You said your daughters already feel like outsiders, IMO they shouldn't let this bother them because as Tigger71 said

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The people that matter most are the ones that will remember!
I kind of go through a similar situation with Lenny's family. Lenny's brothers and sister knows the older brother and sisters kids' birthdays (4 of them) but none of them remember when Abby's is. When I do actually see them, I constantly get questions "how old is she again" "what grade is she in" "when was she born again." Luckily for me, Abby is who she is and doesn't get upset that they don't remember anything about her. I don't get upset anymore either because Lenny's side of the family doesn't matter to me.
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