At a crossroads~~BIG vent! About This Page:

[disneyknut]

For the past couple of weeks I have been at a crossroads in my life & am not sure which road to take..
As most of you know, I work as a Cafeteria Aide at my sons school. I do not get paid a lot (Understatement of the year~ my pay averages to $7 a day) I did not take the job for the money, I took the job 2 years ago as a favor to our Principal who was in a bind when an aide quit,thinking I would stay until they found a permanent person [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif[/img] how odd that the same Principal is the reason I am really disliking my job & thinking of quitting. When I started there I was under the impression by the cafeteria manager, head of food service etc, that my job description was to watch over the kids & take appropriate discipline measures ( our discipline is, you sit at a desk away from the rest of the students for the lunch period & aren't allwed to buy snacks after lunch.), among other things ( open juices etc) Kids know that I have a "3 chance rule" If I tell you something & you don't listen & I need to come back to you, the third time I come back to you, you're at a desk. This system has worked great for the first 2 years. Well, this year the other aide had surgery, putting me #1 in charge. Principal wants to retire & doesn't want any waves caused ( he is afraid of the parents when they call with their "My little Susie would NEVER do that!") This year has been a disaster with the principal upstaging my discipline ( he would NEVER do that if the other aide were there, she would be telling him off) & then reprimanding me when I discipline a child.( He told me I'm 'over the top' & I expect all kids to act like mine, I've got odd kids~ ~ ODD??? because they show respect & listen???) Needless to say, the kids are running the show, so to speak. They know that I don't have a lot of power to correct them anymore so they are basically doing what they want.The teacher who helps out during lunch has also been reprimanded by the principal & told to ease up or the parents will call & complain . I have tried to talk to the Principal but he just tells me I need to let things go (Yes, this is the SAME principal that told me to when my son was being bullied for my kid to HIT the other kid) soo... I have been VERY unhappy at work the past several months & am thinking of not coming back for the next school year. I can easily go to the Disney store which is just down the road from me & get a job that pays probably the same $$. ( or more) BUT.... ( you knew that "BUT" was coming! [img]images/icons/tongue.gif[/img] ) I do LOVE my job most of the time, my kids enjoy me being there & I love my co-workers. The aide who is STILL out from surgery keeps saying that things will be different when she comes back ( next year) but I'm not sure it will. DH's solution is to apply at the Disney store & see what happens over the Summer.. if I like the job stay there & not go back to the school & even if I do decide to go back to the school I could work both jobs ( the cafeteria job is only 1-1/2hrs a day) & then I have a 'fall back' job.
Unfortunately, the State retirement package that our Principal has been waiting for doesn't look like it's going to be passed so he wont be retiring this year AND if he doesn't go this year his next 'window' of opportunity is 2 years from now. I don't think I could stand working there under the conditions there are now for another 2 years. Isn't it SAD when a 2nd grader has more control than a 50+ yr old Principal?? Gosh, when I went to school I FEARED our principal. [img]images/icons/shocked.gif[/img] At our school, it's norm to talk back to the Principal & then have Mommy call him & complain that their child is being 'picked on'.
The thing that bugs me the most is I feel myself taking out my frustration on the kids at school & I used to have a great time & I really am not strict ( I'm the fun lunch lady) but recently I've found myself simply going through the motions.. no chatting up the kids or teasing them.
BTW... Since my co-worker hasn't returned DH has done yet another favor for our Principal & he has stepped in to be the other lunch aide ( or lunch boy as my DD calls him [img]images/icons/grin.gif[/img] ) Our Principal was in a bind again & knew DH had all the Act 33 & 34 clearances so he asked him to help out. DH has brought some control to the lunch room but the Principal still wants 'no waves'
What to do, what to do???? [img]images/icons/confused.gif[/img] Any suggestions would be appreciated!
I'll end this long rant on the plus side.... After lots of thought ( & prayer) I have decided to go back to school. I bought a web site several months ago for my business & for the life of me can not get it up & running. I know HTML but I don't know the 'publishing' part of it. I love playing on the web & doing HTML designs etc so I decided to take a course in Web design.. The cost was fairly cheap $500 & in it I get Microsoft Front page 2000 (which costs $150 on sale) plus another publishing program so I'm getting the program I need to publish my site AND also learn from the experts how to publish, write etc a web site for an inexpensive amount. This is something I would really like to do & might make it a part time job down the road .
Anyone else in the web designing field? Is it fun, easy etc???
Sorry for the long post but I knew you'd understand the vent & would give me honest opinions !!!

[ 04-24-2003, 09:15 AM: Message edited by: disneyknut ]

[luvnwdwgal]

This is what I would do. I would apply for the job at the Disney Store and quit working at the school. It's not worth all the frustration. Good luck on the new website!! [img]images/icons/smile.gif[/img]

[AKLRULZ]

Ann, gosh - what a rock and a hard place you are in. Sounds like things won't change with that current principal, so if you can stomach working in the environment with the pros you list - if they mitigate the negative - stay and make the best of it. If the cons outweigh staying - leave and find a job that you'll be happy with "24/7".

Good luck with your decision.

Oh yeah - I have just recently learned all that "HTML stuff" as my partner and I designed our company's website from scratch. Let me tell you, if I can learn it - anyone can! LOL - good luck w/ the course! [img]graemlins/wavin.gif[/img]

[jams67]

Let me start by saying this is MY opinion. It seems to me that you get one chance at life. Why not go through it as happy a you can be? The kids may be disappointed at your not being there at first but you would be happier. Besides you can still do special things with them in and out of school. I say go with your heart. Whatever that is.

Julie

[Wendyismyname]

I agree!! Do what you feel is best! There's alot of stress in school systems that you never know or appreciate until you work in one. I too was a lunch lady, I worked in the cafeteria(doing dishes and this and that) and I loved the job and the kids(high school). However, the people(administrators, and cafeteria boss) were a different story. They tell us our job, with clearly written job descriptions, then boom! Things change and you, being a lowly worker, aren't aware of the changes until you get reprimanded. Also, this being a small town, the women I worked with would gladly stab you in the back. At the high school, the principal is awesome. He was never the problem, it was the big wigs!
At the elementary, where I would often sub before getting the full time job, it is totally different! Those lunch lady monitors are strict and they have to be. I don't know if they have had problems, but I am bet they have. The principal there leaves alot to be desired. Ugh, he's redheaded and has the temper to match! I'd love to see him go........far away!

Well, in the end, you gotta be happy. I can't think of a happier place than working for (anything) Disney!!

WEndy

[CRCrazy]

Hey Ann - I can definitely understand your frustration - I work at my children's school as a substitute teacher for their benefit and mine - they like that I come to school and can see them at various times during the day. We do not have a cafeteria aide at our school - the teachers/asst. principal/guidance counselor take turns doing duty during the 3 different lunch periods. This duty is THE most dreaded duty for all the teachers. Unfortunately, when you are trying to put that many children through the lunchroom in a calm, healthy eating environment, you need to be able to maintain discipline. For our younger kids, gr 1-3, they go out to recess right after lunch. They get a yellow circle for a first offense - second offense gets them a red, which means they lose five minutes of recess time. These are for the standard offenses. Our school is a demonstration school for the PBIS (Positive Behavior Intervention Strategies) program, and we will be instituting this schoolwide for the next year. There will be rewards for positive behaviors, which will be directly taught to the children, using lots of modelling techniques. Kids need to be taught how to be good and treat themselves, their cafeteria, and their classmates with respect. Sounds like you have a good program there. If you let the bad behaviors slide - these will soon become the accepted behaviors - that's when the well-behaved, respectful children become "odd!"

I think you should try to stick to your guns if you truly like your job, but it might not be a bad idea to put an application in at the Disney Store, and see if you can pick up a part-time job that you enjoy as well - think of the perks!!

Good Luck with your decision making -

[LanieLovesDisney]

Ann,
How bout this: apply for the Disney Store (where you get FREE passes to Disneyworld for holidays!!!) and then you'll be even happier b/c you can take your kids to their fave place! AND...if you wanted to you could work at DS part time and volunteer at the school sometimes! Be a room mother!

Life is TOO LOOOOOONG to be unhappy!

I know you'll make the right decision. Doesn't it stink sometimes to be a grown up?

Love ya,
Mel

[LuvMK]

There's nothing worse than a principal that won't support the adults in the building that are responsible for maintaining the control. [img]images/icons/mad.gif[/img]

Ann, I know at my school we teachers have the utmost respect for our lunchroom monitor. [img]images/icons/smile.gif[/img] We stress to our children that she is in charge in the cafeteria and they better listen and follow the caferteria rules. We have a green/yellow/red system and there are rewards for greens and consequences for yellows and reds. Our kids work hard for those greens!
And our principal fully supports our lunchroom monitor and her rules and consequences.
This is a difficult decision for you! I know its great to be at school with your kids, but if you are miserable your children will know that school is a negative place for you. I really would speak to the principal to clarify his expectations for behavior in the cafeteria and suggestions on how to attain that behavior. If you make the attempt to settle this and get nowhere that is surely a sign that you need to move on to something that will allow you to be happy.
Lots of pixie dust for you as you struggle with this decision!

[Teresa]

Boy, sure sounds like a hard decision.
My first thought is to ask the principal ifhe feels video taping the lunch room might not be a good idea. No more "oh, not my Angel" when the parent can SEE exactly what happened.

Or, work elsewhere and go to lunch with your kids once a week.
Maybe you should speak candidly with your Principle. The fact that he could lose a good worker may make him decide he should back you up.

Don't you just hate it when the kids and their parents have more control than the workers, teachers, and administration? In DD-9's old school, kids that SHOULD have been held back were passed because their parents fought retention.
Last year in 3rd grade, I spent all my volunteer time (6 hrs. week) teaching 8-10 yr. olds how to read and do simple math, not what I wanted to do to help in DD's class (I never got to work with her)