Breeanna is actually asleep on a BED!!! About This Page:

[graygables]

Poor thing is just a firecracker all the time (with a short fuse! ) and she CANNOT fall asleep without being "cuddled" or on the sofa. I have tried every strategy known to mankind to get her to sleep on her bed (even put a DVD/TV in her room ), but no luck.

DH suggested today that I dump the guest bed in my office to make more room for my "workshop" and it tempted me, but then it occurred to me to try to get Breeanna to sleep there while I work (I usually work until 2am), sooooo I had her come in about 11pm and lay down. She balked at first, but when I put on Live365 Sorcerer Radio, she settled right down with her book. Finally, at 1215, she was out like a light!

This is a coup at my house. Asleep before 1am and in a bed that isn't mine. Now, if I could just think of it as sleeping and not recharging!

[Annabel]

That's great Dawn - let's hope it's a sign of things to come

[debsta922]

That's great Dawn!

[tigger22]

That's great!

[HiddenMickey]

Good Dawn.

After reading this and remembering previous posts about her sleep, I want to give you some advice. I think that your biggest problem with getting Breanna to sleep is that you are waiting too long before putting her to bed. She gets that "second wind" and can't get to sleep. I've seen this phenomena in my DD several times. There is a small window of opportunity in which she'll go to sleep without problem.
I would like to suggest that you start putting her to bed really early, like 8pm (both your girls should probably be in bed then). Children need a good 9-10 hours of sleep a night and I don't think she's getting it with the hours you guys keep. Also, make sure she's getting enough excercise during the day. The activity will help her get to sleep better at night. The fact that she has a "short fuse" is a big clue to her lack of sleep. Once you get her on a better schedule, I'm sure you'll see a much more pleasant and calm child.

-HiddenMickey

[hktmom]

I'd have to agree with HiddenMickey. The short fuse is a huge red flag.

It sounds like she's gotten you so tired you're willing to accept any form of sleep from her so you can get some rest, any amount of rest, yourself. Clearly, you're both exhausted.

But you are Mommy and she's the daughter and it's going to take some real work on your part to get her in her bed and stay there and at a reasonable hour. You can't keep doing what you're doing or you will break.

Sooo, each night be sure she's had everything she needs before the lights are out so there are no excuses from her later. Drink, blankie, hugs and kisses from everyone, story, what ever...Then put her to bed with warms loving words but telling her it's bedtime and this is where she sleeps. Don't draw it out or repeat yourself when she starts to argue with you or engange in a discussion of it. Kiss, hug, goodnight and walk out. When she comes out, walk her back to bed say "Bedtime" and walk out. After that, everytime she comes out don't say a word as you'll only be engaging her and then she's got you hooked...SAY NOTHING but calmly, calmly, calmly put her back into bed and walk out. Do that repeatedly until she falls asleep. Alternately, you can sit in her room away from her but NO eye contact. And wait until she falls asleep. Putting her back in her bed each time in the same manner as above. Then each night sit further away from her bed until you can be out completely.

This is what SuperNanny does and this is what I've done with both my children over the years. It works. But you have to be willing to go the long road and know that it is what's best for her and your whole family. It by no means you love her less if she's crying and you don't give in. You are showing her what it means to be a big girl and showing her what it means to be healthy by getting proper sleep. If she's not well rested come school years she's not going to be alert enough to learn properly. Or make healthy relatioships because she's going to be cranky.

You'll know when it's time to dig in, hopefully it's soon. So you get some rest.

Good luck!

I know you posted because you were so pleased she finally slept outside of your bedroom and that feels like a big step for her and you! AND IT IS!! And you stated you've tried everyother trick you've heard of, I don't doubt it. So props to you for all the work you've already put in. I don't want to take away from that. You love her, you are really trying and that is so great. You understand that she needs to get independent from you. But if I may say so, lovingly, it sounds like perhaps Mommy needs to get a bit more independent from big girl Breanna too, maybe? If that's true and you can own that, decide to finish this deal and not let YOUR feelings impede on HER ability to go to her own bed each night. You will not have any less of her love for doing so. I promise.

Heather
Heather

[graygables]

Thanks all for the tips and advice! I forgot to add that Breeanna is bipolar which is why she has a lot of insomnia and such. It's a nasty, unpredictable cycle that we have been unable to break. She actually stayed asleep (no nightmares, which are also frequent for her) and woke up without crankies at 9am (too bad the "without crankies" part didn't hang around all day ) The magic of Disney music, I guess!

[hktmom]

OOOHHHH! Well, that does change things a bit doesn't it. You have other issues other than typical growing stages...so now it makes sense. So forget what I said...I didn't know and I apologize for being so forward ignorantly! It wasn't my place-

BiPolar is challenging, I've known fairly intimately a few people in my life that are bi-polar, one very severely. You must give more of yourself in ways we can't understand to Breanna, and thank God above she has a mommy that loves her so much to help her through her nightmares, her crankies, all her ups and downs. You're a blessing to her as she is to you, but you already knew that.



Heather

[graygables]

Heather and I really do appreciate your advice *AND* I'm sure someone else will read it and be helped by it, too! No apologies necessary!!!

She is having a better afternoon and just came in and said she couldn't wait to go to sleep in my office again (yay!).

[hktmom]

That is yay! Good girl Breeanna! Go to sleep sweetie pie! step by step Dawn, step by step!

And thank you for hearing my sincerity in my apology. I was worried about your feelings all afternoon until I came home and I could check to see if you had responded. Whew!

Have a great sleep tonight! I'll catch up with you sometime this weekend up sure!

Heather

[DrDolphin]

Glad to hear Breanna is making some great steps!!!