For Those with Teenagers About This Page:

[JoanneS]

Once again, my company is getting to welcome into our company a group of 15 young people as interns. It made me think of how many things they will learn and whether mom's and dad's of teenagers can say "yes" to all of the following:

-Can your teen make their own bed? Do they do hospital corners?
-Can your teen do their own laundry? Fold the clothes properly after? Do they know how to iron?
-Can your teen make themselves a meal? (one that isn't prepackaged)
- boil an egg
-fry a burger
-make a salad
-Can your teen sew on a button? Hem a pair of pants?
-Can your teen clean a toilet properly? Do they know what a toilet bowl brush is and can they use it?
-Can they get themselves up with an alarm clock?

Out of all the young folks that have come through our doors in the last 18 years, there hasn't been one kid that could do it all. And I wonder how we can send kids out into the world without being able to do some of these things. They're all wonderful kids, but I'm amazed at how many simple things they've never learned. I'm sure their parents think they're ready to go out on their own, but they obviously never stopped to think about what they didn't teach them to do. In many instances, the maid did the cleaning, Mom did all the cooking, and grandma did all the sewing. You may think the child is learning by osmosis, but it doesn't happen that way.

Before your children graduate, take a moment to make sure the little things are covered. Teach them that they don't have to throw away a shirt when a button comes off, you don't have to eat out every night, and that scrubbing bubbles are more than cartoon characters.

And this is your public service announcement of the day... And my vent of the day!

[HiddenMickey]

-Can your teen make their own bed? Do they do hospital corners?
Yes, they know how to make a bed, but they both only use a comforter and bottom fitted sheet (nothing to tuck in)

-Can your teen do their own laundry? Fold the clothes properly after? Do they know how to iron?
DS went to school with only one lesson on laundry. (He kept putting me off on lessons). He's doing just fine with it. DD also knows how but I do almost all the laundry at home. They don't fold as well as I do, but do fine (they do help with this at home); we rarely iron anything, but DH has shown DS how to do it

-Can your teen make themselves a meal? (one that isn't prepackaged)
Yes, both kids know how to make a few things. They won't starve.
- boil an egg not sure, DS doesn't eat them and DD does eat them and I think I've shown her how to do it
-fry a burger pretty sure they can both do this
-make a salad yes, they can do this

-Can your teen sew on a button? Hem a pair of pants? I've shown them how to do buttons, have never shown them how to hem (How often does that come up?)

-Can your teen clean a toilet properly? Do they know what a toilet bowl brush is and can they use it? Both do know how to do this and occasionally are told to do so at home

-Can they get themselves up with an alarm clock? Yes, but I wasn't sure when I sent DS off to school. I've always been the one to get them up for school in the morning.

[jenifermg0]

Went down the list....my DS can do most of it, he just doesn't want to or doesn't think to do some of them (like scrub the toilet - it's been one of his chores off and on for years). I'm going to have to take this list and add a few more things to it and make sure he can do them before he graduates in two years!

BTW - my kid can rock out the cooking! He made DH and I dinner one night....Sauted Salmon with wild rice and wild mushroom ragout!! It was AWESOME! So at least I know he won't starve!!!!

[Huntermom]

Mine are all young adults now but could do all of those as teens except the hospital corners. Like Hidden Mickey, we always did a fitted bottom sheet with a comforter so there was no need to make corners.

Both my boys are excellent cooks. My older son made the best lentil soup last time he was home and my middle son bakes salt free bread for me. My daughter has basic cooking skills and can follow a recipe but never had the interest her brothers did.

All my kids took over their own laundry at around 12 or 13. Not because they had too, but because they preferred to handle their own clothing.

As far as toilet cleaning (actually bathroom cleaning), it was a high paying chore at my house so my middle son would often volunteer to do it.

My kids can sew a button on but we use a tailor to hem pants. To me they are too easy to mess up and awfully expensive if you ruin a good pair of slacks.

My Dd doesn't iron by choice but my boys do. Older son wears a suit each day to work and washes and irons his dress shirts even though his dad's went to the cleaners.

My kids also always got themselves up for school. Elemtary school started late enough, they did not have to be woken up, bu middle school they took care of it themselves. Middle son has had many jobs as a wildlife expert which required him to be out the door before 5. Oldest was a lifeguard and swim instructor at the Y in high school who frequently opened the pool at 5:30. MY kids were never allowed to sleep until noon. They had things to do and places to be.

[Teresa]

I have 3 DDs, 29, 19, and 15 - I'll answer based on what each of them knew by 18, with the exception of DD Lauren (15)
-Can your teen make their own bed? Yes
Do they do hospital corners? They better! it's the only way I like beds made - Dad was ex-military and mom was/still is a nurse! The idea of kids not having a top sheet to absorb their nasty sweat, etc. is gross!!
-Can your teen do their own laundry? Yes
Fold the clothes properly after? Yes, they do tend to not fold their undies, but that's okay - I'm more concerned about wrinkles in shirts and pants.
Do they know how to iron? Yes, but they're not great at it.
-Can your teen make themselves a meal? (one that isn't prepackaged) YES! They're all pretty decent cooks, some better than others. DD Kathryn (19) is the most clueless
- boil an egg Yes, all but Lauren. Lauren is allergic to eggs, and so has never had them.
-fry a burger Well, they know how to grill them. We don't eat burgers a lot, though. About 1 or 2 times a year - and usually at someone else's house.
-make a salad Oh yeah!
-Can your teen sew on a button? DD Samantha can't, but that's because she's a quadriplegic and while she can move her arms, has no control of her hands.
Hem a pair of pants? Well, no. I'd guess they could do it with duct tape, but that's about it.
-Can your teen clean a toilet properly? The two younger ones can not only clean a toilet, they can shine up a bathroom like you wouldn't believe.
Do they know what a toilet bowl brush is and can they use it? Well, yes.
-Can they get themselves up with an alarm clock? When need be, they will.

I know what you mean about kids not knowing much. We've had friends of the girls here before who were shocked that: mac and cheese didn't come from a blue box, chocolate chip cookies didn't come from a roll in the fridge, and soup/stew do not come from a can. Now, I will admit to letting my kids eat frozen pizza and (as much as I hate it) they love Ramen!

[feonag]

I work in food service with a bunch of teenagers even ones that are older 19-20, that do not know how to make change in their heads. If someone hands them change after they pushed the button on the register they are completely lost and cannot do it in their heads. Also most kids do not know how to work, they will not just see what needs to be done and do it, they will just stand around until someone tells them what to do(maybe it is just laziness). We also have a lot of kids that are so disrespectful to all adults and they talk to me(and other adults old enough to be their parents) like they are talking to their friends and say "shut up" and "get the "F" away from me", etc. I think most parents would be shocked to know that their "good" child is really not that nice when not with them.

[HiddenMickey]

Teresa-- we wash the comforters, just like you would a sheet. Nothing yucky about that. When the kids were little they either got tangled in the sheets or the sheets got pushed to the bottom of the bed while sleeping. We made it easier for them by cutting out the top sheet altogether. It's what they both prefer. Even when at a hotel, they push off the bedspread and sheet and use their comforter.

[Huntermom]

I do the same as Hidden Mickey with the comforters-wash them regularly. Like my kids I sleep under a down comforter or a fleece blanket. I have never felt it was "gross" and neither my kids nor I ever got them particularly sweaty. We keep the house cool in a colder climate. You don't sweat a lot when you are healthy and sleeping in a 55 degree room.

We also bring fleece blanket with us when we travel. I find hotel bedspreads "gross." I don't even like to sit on them.

[hoosiermomma2]

I have 2 kids--a 16 year old and a 10 year old.

Can your teen make their own bed? Yes, they both can make their own bed.Do they do hospital corners? No--they also sleep under the comforter that gets washed frequently. Even when they were little--if we made the bed with a top sheet they would remove it.
-Can your teen do their own laundry? Fold the clothes properly after? Do they know how to iron? DD (16) has done her own laundery since she was 12. She can fold it properly but prefers to hang or lump it all on the floor in a pile. Ds (10) is learning how to do laundry. He knows how to load, run, and add detergent to the washer, switch the load and clean the lint trap and turn it on. He is learning how to fold clothes properly--but he does try and does a decent job. Neither can iron. DD could probably with a little guidance but doesn't have much that needs ironed. Ds has adhd and a hot iron is his hands at this point could be dangerous...even with me on top of him....just that attention to detail.
-Can your teen make themselves a meal? (one that isn't prepackaged) DD can make spaghetti, eggs, grilled cheese and tomato soup, basic stuff. Ds can make pbj, toast, fruit salad, cereal, etc. We are working on following recipes and he helps with dinner so that he can learn some of the basics.
- boil an egg-they don't eat boiled eggs but dd probably could. Ds likes deviled eggs and has helped to peel and mix up the mixture for those.
-fry a burger--probably not. Dd does saute onions for her burgers....and might be able to--but might not get it all the way done.
-make a salad Yes, DD definitely--she's made them before. Ds has helped
-Can your teen sew on a button? DD can, she did sewing in 4H, Ds can not.Hem a pair of pants? Maybe...again she did sewing in 4H and made a skirt which had to be hemmed. But she had help...not mine...I can't sew...lol
-Can your teen clean a toilet properly? Yes, both my kids have learned how to clean the bathroom. Ds with supervision and some guidance but both can.Do they know what a toilet bowl brush is and can they use it? Yes, both know what it is and how to use it. DD hates to...ds....he doesn't seem to mind.
-Can they get themselves up with an alarm clock? DD has gotten herself up for school since middle school. I try to stay alert to whether I hear movements but she's only missed the bus once or twice in 5 years. Ds cannot get himself up. He's only in 4th grade and sleeps through his alarm. But he has to take meds to sleep at night because of his adhd meds and his adhd...so he sleeps pretty soundly.

[MichaelF]

My kids can do all but the hospital corners on the bed and probably boil an egg. I suppose they could get directions and do the egg properly. The biggest problem for my kids with any of the tasks is doing them properly because they are in a hurry or at times just plain lazy.

[krisk11]

-Can your teen make their own bed? Do they do hospital corners? Yes she can make her bed but I don't even know what hospital corners are so I doubt my dd does. Unless someone is coming to the house we don't make the bed
-Can your teen do their own laundry? Fold the clothes properly after? Do they know how to iron? Yes my dd can do laundry as she does all the laundry during the summer. She can fold but isn't great. I hate ironing so we rarely do it plus not much needs to be ironed these days.
-Can your teen make themselves a meal? (one that isn't prepackaged) She makes a mean grilled cheese. I buy freezer meals for the days she leaves for work before I get home.
- boil an egg no
-fry a burger she doesn't eat red meat
-make a salad yes
-Can your teen sew on a button? Hem a pair of pants? No to button and we would send pants out that need to be hemmed because it's easier than getting out my sewing machine.
-Can your teen clean a toilet properly? Do they know what a toilet bowl brush is and can they use it? yes
-Can they get themselves up with an alarm clock? yes she sets the alarm on her cell phone

[Pretty Kitty]

My kids have been instructed and helped me do all those things except the sewing(my sewing machine does buttons) and ironing. Does that mean they will do it away from home? Most likely not. Please understand I am not trying to start a disagreement but just point out teenagers do have choices. So in defense of parents who have tried to teach their children----- it isn't always because the children didn't have instruct.

[Huntermom]

Based on my recollection of college dorm rooms (both way back when I was in school and more recently with my kids) I wholeheartly agree with Pretty Kitty. I have seem some dorm rooms of the kids of neat as a pin parents who prepared their kids well that look like a tornado hit.

I also remember when I was in college, linen service was part of the room and board payment. You would get two flat sheets and three towels every week. Very few kids used the sheets and brought fitted ones from home. By the time my kids got to school, if you wanted linen service (with fitted sheets) you had to pay. I also encountered kids who only changed sheets at semester break and laundry was always left in the bag or basket. My recollections are from 40 years ago, so some of these things are not new.

[ShellingConnie]

Looking over the list - the only things mine don't know how to do is hem pants (I can't hem a straight line), make hospital corners on beds (I don't even mess with this), and iron (I hardly ever iron. ick).

Everything else I've taught them and they do pretty regularly. They probably won't clean a thing when they get their own places because I won't be there to tell them to do it though.

I definitely need to teach them how to iron still.