TMI warning...10yo is frustrating me, has anyone ever heard of this??? About This Page:

[graygables]

10yo DD (Asperger's, selective mutism) is refusing to flush her toilet paper (sorry for any confusion! [img]/ubb/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img]). gag. She throws it in the trash can. [img]/ubb/images/graemlins/ukid.gif[/img] We had a chat on our trip about NOT doing that (it can make people sick who handle it, it's just gross, etc) and she did OK in the hotel, but now that we're home again, in the trash it goes. I cannot get her to flush it for anything. I believe she stopped the toilet (easy to do at our house, low flush combined w/ an old septic) and was humiliated by DH, so now she's more afraid of that than being disciplined for putting it in the trash.

Any ideas? I've tried rewards, etc, nothing is working. Anyone even ever heard of such a thing before???

[Happymommy]

I responded, but by TP (I'm a little clueless sometimes), I didn't realize what you were talking about. Got it now. I don't know what to do about that. That's a shame though-- poor kid. Aidan (my son with Aspergers) goes through weird phases and there are things that really freak him out, and then he gets over them (for the first few months he was potty trained, he would only pee in plastic cups, because he was so afraid of spilling around the toilet (and I swear I never once yelled at him or anything). I kept plastic cups and ziplock bags in the bathroom and in diaper bags, and when he finished with the cup, I dumped the contents and then put the cup in ziplock bag and threw out. He would not use public restrooms either. But, he got past that (pretty quickly too thank goodness). Do you guys see an occupational therapist?-- if so I would talk to them about it and see what they can do. Sometimes his OT is helpful, but usually its something the three of us (Joe, Aidan and I) have to figure out for ourselves. Did you talk to her about the fact that what happened could happen to anyone, etc., maybe she was ok in the hotel because she figured if something happened her dad wouldn't be the one to fix the toilet. Why don't you make a deal that if something happens you'll have a plumber come rather than your husband fixing it (I can understand why she would be embarrassed)

[lablady]

Have you thought of removing the trash cans? This is probably too simplistic, but it might work? Carrying it through the house might be more embarrassing to her. Good luck!

[Stripes]

Removing the trashcan was my first thought.

[Teresa]

My first thought is if she's not flushing her TP, then you need to make it easier for YOU to accept that she's not. Since talking to her and discipline hasn't helped, time to work with it.
Buy some cheap sandwich baggies, and have her put her TP in one, then throw it away. Then, she can take out the trash from that bathroom everynight.
She may tire of this process, but may not. As long as SHE deals with it, that's fine. The way to be able to let her do it is to remember the product isn't any worse than a diaper.

Good luck.

[BritDisFan]

I don't really know what to suggest Dawn but putting toilet paper in the bin is common practise in Greece and Turkey. Their sewerage system cannot cope with it being flushed down the toilet. The first time I went to Turkey I was a bit horrified that we had to put the toilet paper in the bin.

Maybe it's just a passing phase and she will grow out of it [img]/ubb/images/graemlins/fairy2.gif[/img].

Karen

[graygables]

[ QUOTE ]
I don't really know what to suggest Dawn but putting toilet paper in the bin is common practise in Greece and Turkey. Their sewerage system cannot cope with it being flushed down the toilet. The first time I went to Turkey I was a bit horrified that we had to put the toilet paper in the bin.

Maybe it's just a passing phase and she will grow out of it [img]/ubb/images/graemlins/fairy2.gif[/img].

Karen

[/ QUOTE ]

Now that you mention it,I REMEMBER that! [img]/ubb/images/graemlins/jawdrop.gif[/img] I guess I was so traumatized by standing on the little footpads and squatting that I'd forgotten what the paper situation was like! [img]/ubb/images/graemlins/rofl2.gif[/img] I do remember we always carried our own roll, too. [img]/ubb/images/graemlins/ukid.gif[/img]

Thanks everyone for the suggestions. I think we'll put a small, lined bin in there in a discreet place just for her use and have her be the one to deal with it. I don't know why it freaks me out so much...both my younger ones wore cloth diapers w/ cloth wipes and I never had any problems dealing with it then. I guess I'm more concerned about guests seeing it and the fact that Mr. Monk (DH) flips out. [img]/ubb/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]