You've lost the weight now let's celebrate....with a trip down memory lane. About This Page:

[CinderAbby]

**Since some of the things that happened during this time also coincide with my Disney PTR, I won't mention it all here so I will just stick with Abby trying to lose weight. And for introductions, it's the usual cast. Me, Lenny and Abby. For those that don't know us, you can click on the link in the bottom to go to any and all of my Disney TR's to know who we are.

This trip came about for one reason only: as an incentive for Abby to lose weight. As you can see, none of us are small by any means but the doctor has been telling me for years that she needs to lose weight. I didn't need to be told this - I knew it already but making it happen is a much different thing. I grew up a Pooh sized teen and it was impossible for me to lose weight. My parents always told me I needed to lose weight and they would buy me things like motivational cassette tapes or Richard Simmons Sweating to the Oldies videos to "help" me do it. Those things weren't a help as what teen wants to listen to someone talking on a tape and whenever I wanted to use the exercise videos, I had no place to do it. The living room had plenty of room but someone was always watching tv it seems. My room had a tv but it was too small to exercise in. Mom and dad didn't help either as the few times I could manage to use the living room, there was still someone there to walk through or watch me and it made me feel very self-conscience. When it came to the supermarket, they didn't help there either. If I wanted to pick up soda or cookies or ice cream, I was never told to put it back unless it was a matter of not having the money that week. All of this means two things. 1 as a teen, I never lost weight and 2) when it came time to telling Abby to lose weight, I was going to support her in that effort.

I had tried various times over the years to encourage Abby to lose weight but it never lasted long. Usually what happened was I would only buy certain foods for us to eat then my mother would turn around and buy junk and then say "one won't hurt Abby" or "Abby can have some" of whatever it is she bought - cookies, cupcakes, fudge bars, etc. Anytime mom did that, I got mad saying "I'm trying to get her to lose weight and you're not helping. It's never one of whatever it is you buy. You have the one and then let Abby eat the rest" which of course made mom mad. Then it seemed like she'd go out and buy more stuff just to spite me. A few times mom did say "Abby needs to lose weight" but she would never admit to any fault - it was all my doing. I'm the one who buys the food, etc but once I started working two jobs (6 years ago and back when Lenny was working two jobs as well) it was my mother who was home at dinner time letting Abby eat whatever she wanted and putting no limits on how much Abby ate. I would tell Abby what she should have but that fell on deaf ears. No one listened.

Now fast forward to last November when Abby had her annual check up with the doctor. He was once again unhappy with her weight and I told him getting her out to exercise was like pulling teeth, watching how much she ate was hard as I'm out of the house 7 days a week and my mother bought stuff and let Abby have it even if I said I didn't want her to do that. He pretty much said that I would have to figure something out with mom, that she should be on board with Abby losing weight (you would think) and for Abby maybe I could come up with some sort of incentive for her to try and lose the weight. Since this appointment was kind of in the middle of Lenny being home with the broken femur and the holidays and all that "fun" stuff I had to deal with I did nothing about Abby's weight. There was nothing I could really think of that would make Abby want to lose it anyway.

Then 2018 came and at the end of February, I stopped and took a really good look at Abby. She's big, just like me and Lenny but she didn't look comfortable in her clothes and I decided enough was enough. She needed to lose weight and I was putting my foot down. She was going to do it, no ifs and or buts about it. I had Abby get on the scale and she pretty much was quite upset with me over it. She didn't want to get on the scale for any reason but I told her too bad. She didn't weigh as much as I feared she did but she still weighed more than Lenny and I did. After seeing her weight, I told her that it was time, she needed to lose weight and while the conversation wasn't as simple as it sounded (I told Abby she was going to lose weight, Abby wasn't happy and was crying, yelling at me I was being mean by making her get on the scale), we finally came to an "agreement." Abby would try to lose weight and for doing so, I would give her different "rewards" - mini golf outings, trips to the go cart track if she was under any weight limits they have, trips to the bowling alley, etc. These are all things she liked and she agreed to it. Then, my mother who came in during the "conversation" stated "Abby, if you lose weight, we'll take you back to Storyland to see Farm Follies. I know how much you love the show." Abby's eyes lit up at that though while I was picking my jaw up off the floor. Mom's suggestion of an incentive got Abby's attention and the two of them kind of ran with it.

To explain why this thought excited Abby so much you need to understand the first amusement park we ever took her to was Storyland. It was just her size - a small park with rides geared towards smaller kids. No big coasters and nothing scary. It was something that could be done in a day and for us, just a few hours from home (yes, I know Disney is a few hours from home too if we take a plane but stay with me here :-) ). We could go for a weekend and no one would really have to ask for time off from work. With a small child, it was really ideal. Abby absolutely fell in love with Storyland and we took her several times as she was growing up. When Abby was 6, we started going to Disney - where the rides were bigger and longer and fun for several days - and we stopped going to Storyland. Abby never stopped wanting to return to Storyland though. Every time she saw a commercial on the TV or saw an ad or video on the computer, she would ask to return. Then as she got older, she knew how to "find" things about Storyland online and every time she did, she would show them to me making comments like "maybe some day we can go back to Storyland." When I heard this, I normally asked "wouldn't you rather go back to Disney though? Storyland is really small." Abby usually answered that yes, she would rather go to Disney but in her heart, I know she really wanted to go back to Storyland. One part of Storyland that she just absolutely loves is the show "Farm Follies" and I can't even begin to tell you how often she has watched this show either on the disc I made of it or from the online video she has found of the show. Even today - at 18 years old - she still loves this show and watches it often online. With mom's suggestion of going back to Storyland just to see this show was Abby's dream come true even if there was a "catch" to it of losing the weight.

As for me however, as much as this trip might be a trip down memory lane and exciting for Abby, I wasn't happy with the "we will take you" comment I love my mother, don't get me wrong, but there were too many problems with this whole "we" comment. First off is my mother is a lead foot. There really is no way I wanted myself or Abby in a vehicle with her for 3 ½ hours. Second, she's a smoker and whenever she drives, she'll have the windows open EXCEPT when she smokes. I don't get that. Everyone else opens the windows to smoke but she closes them. Third - anytime Abby is in a vehicle with her, especially in the back seat, for any length of time I hear the dreaded "I don't feel well comment" which usually is soon followed by Abby throwing up. Fourth - mom has two dogs and two rabbits. If mom, Abby and I went to New Hampshire, who was going to take care of the animals? Mom's idea was to take the dogs with us but that's not fair to them. Fifth - she was purposely excluding Lenny saying "I doubt Home Depot will give him the time off anyway. Sixth - she wanted to do this all in one day. Drive up for 3 ½ hours, go into the park and then drive home for 3 ½ hours. And this was to be on my one "day off" a week (I work 6 days a week at my "paying" jobs but that last day is spent running around doing all my errands so it's not a day off). Seventh - and probably the biggest problem I had with it - is mom said "we will take you" but guess who was expected to foot the bill? Mom might have thought she was going to pay for it but I know her. When it came time to actually take Abby, she would either renege completely and break Abby's heart (no way was I going to let this happen) or she would pull the "who's going to pay for this? I pay all the bills for the house (not true, we help pay things) and can't afford to take time off or to go." Either way, I knew the minute she made the offer I was going to have to figure out a way to pay for it. Lenny was getting close to going back to work but he wasn't back yet at the time of the offer so it was just yet one more "bill" I needed to figure out how to pay on only 60% of his pay. I could probably think of a few other reasons why I didn't like this whole "we will take you" but I think you get the idea.

[chezp]

I do get the idea of why you weren't keen on the "we will take you" approach, but I'm hoping it all works out in the end.

[clio]

I completely understand your feelings on the we will take you. I can't wait to read what you figured out.
Liz

[manticorjenn]

Your mom reminds me so much of my grandmother. The only way I could deal with her is send her back to Texas when her vacation with us was over. I give you all the kudos in the world for dealing with your mom every day.

I am so glad that Abby had the incentive to lose the weight. You all are doing wonderfully in that department. Keep up the good work.

Can't wait to read more.

[Cam22]

Signing on to follow along!

[purplegal]

Glad you were able to find an incentive that worked for Abby, I sure hope she enjoys the trip.

[MayraLR]

Following along. Hope everything worked out!

[DMA]

This trip has been such a great incentive for Abby to lose weight! She must really love Storyland! I hope "we will take you there" works out in the end!

[Tara O'Hara]

I hope this incentive works out for Abby!

[lovewdw2]

Your Mother is a Trip.... and a trip I would NOT go on!

Kudos to you Darlene on putting up with her EVERYDAY!

Can't wait to hear the next part......

[Pris]

This has been a great motivator for Abby, and I am so glad you've been able to find a way to make it work out, despite your mother getting involved.

[Colexis Mom]

More please!!

[pamcarey]

What a great incentive for Abby to lose weight! I loved Storyland as a kid and also when my kids were younger!

[Grammy Grumpy]

I know how hard it is to deal with a person like your mother. Mine had some of those "qualities" but I did not have to live with her 24/7.

We'll be here waiting to hear how you all are doing with your incentives and daily challenges!

[CinderAbby]

Thank you everyone. Mom definitely can be a challenge and there are some days that are worse than others - to the point it makes me happy I work that second job just so I can be out of the house.

Now onto happier things though - a couple more updates.