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If you miss us, you can still find some of us online. Sara started a new blog at DisneyParkPrincess.com -- I strongly urge you to visit and get on her mailing list. She IS the Disney park princess and knows Disney backward and forward. And I am blogging as well at JenniferMaker.com, which is a little craft blog I started a couple of years ago to make ends meet. You can see and hear me in my craft show at https://www.youtube.com/c/jennifermaker . Many PassPorter readers and fans are on Facebook, in groups they formed like the PassPorter Trip Reports and PassPorter Crafting Challenge (if you join, just let them know you read about it in the newsletter). And some of our most devoted community members started a forum of their own at Pixie Dust Lane and all are invited over.

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Go Back   PassPorter - A Community of Walt Disney World, Disneyland, Disney Cruise Line, and General Travel Forums > PassPorter Villa: Sharing the Fun Together > The Family Room: Family and Friends
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Old 06-30-2016, 12:49 PM   #1
jenifermg0
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Pixies for my DH...

Now, a little back story - I haven't posted about this and I know I could have but it just made me terribly sad to even think about it. One of DH's friends has been in the hospital with stage four lung cancer. He was moved on Tuesday from the hospital to assisted living with hospice care.

So last night as I was walking back into the house after a three day work trip, my DH was at the assisted living home visiting. His friend had been getting worse and worse for the past few weeks (we knew it was terminal). While DH was there, his friend passed away. I guess he was taking deep breaths and letting them out and then there would be a pause. And then there just wasn't another breath. We are pretty sure that his friend knew he was there so I feel that that was a blessing for his friend. In addition to DH, his friend's mom, sister and BIL were there as well, so he knows he wasn't alone.

I was looking for pictures of him last night and found a few from when he went with DH, DS, me and DSIL to DW. The pictures are wonderful - he was grinning from ear to ear - wearing a Sorcerer hat, posing with Pooh and Minnie. I'm going to get copies over to his mom and sister for the memorial service and for them to keep. That's how I'm going to remember him.

DH is right on the edge - I'm expecting him to kind of lose it soon. All I can do is be there for him and try not to lose it myself.
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Old 06-30-2016, 01:10 PM   #2
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I'm so sorry for your loss.
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Old 06-30-2016, 01:49 PM   #3
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So sorry for your loss. Hopefully, in time, it will help your hubby to know he was there
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Old 06-30-2016, 01:57 PM   #4
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Sorry for your loss.
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Old 06-30-2016, 02:06 PM   #5
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for your DH and all those affected by this man's passing.
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Old 06-30-2016, 04:06 PM   #6
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I'm so sorry.
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Old 06-30-2016, 04:26 PM   #7
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so sorry
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Old 06-30-2016, 05:11 PM   #8
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So sorry for your loss. My mom also died of lung cancer and the end stage can be very difficult. I hope your husband knows that being with a dying person is so important. I developed a great deal of respect for one of my mother's cousins, who made a point of seeing her at least once a week and it was a 40 minute drive. I lost all respect for my mother's "close friend" who did not visit her at all once her health deteriorated/

Many pixies for your husband, family and the friend and his family.
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Old 06-30-2016, 07:15 PM   #9
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So sorry for your loss
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Old 06-30-2016, 08:33 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by Huntermom View Post
So sorry for your loss. My mom also died of lung cancer and the end stage can be very difficult. I hope your husband knows that being with a dying person is so important. I developed a great deal of respect for one of my mother's cousins, who made a point of seeing her at least once a week and it was a 40 minute drive. I lost all respect for my mother's "close friend" who did not visit her at all once her health deteriorated/

Many pixies for your husband, family and the friend and his family.

We had some drama too with a so called friend. Such drama that my DS (who is a very mellow guy) offered to break the drama king's kneecaps.
My DH was there regularly and our friend's mom told us that we were FAMILY...and even when they started discouraging some visitors (due to the massive drama) we were always welcome to visit.

Thank you to everyone for all the pixies...DH doesn't know I asked, but I know the pixies will still get to him.
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I can still remember my cute little Tiger Cub!

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Old 06-30-2016, 09:26 PM   #11
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Old 06-30-2016, 09:40 PM   #12
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So sorry for your loss!
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Old 07-01-2016, 05:02 PM   #13
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I am sorry for what your DH is going through. My DH had a BFF of 40 years (since age 9) who was at the hospital when my DH passed away. He wasn't in the room as DD and I were and only 2 visitors at a time. Two nights before DH passed his BFF spent the night at his bedside so I could go home and see my DS - I had been up at that point for 36+ hours. I knew his BFF needed that time as much as my DH did even in a coma. I won't lie, DH's death has been incredibly hard on his BFF. It's hard for BFF's wife too as she's grieving having lost a friend of 30 years but pushes it aside to support her grieving DH. I wish you much luck and good thoughts navigating the path you're now on. Please know you're not alone.
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Old 07-01-2016, 05:13 PM   #14
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It was so kind & thoughtful for your DH to be there for his friend and his friends family. That presence is definitely known by the patient even if only subconsciously. I am sending loads of [emoji14]ixies for you both bc you need to be able to grieve and be supportive & strong all at the same time. I figure that uour DHs breaking point will probably be the viewing/service for friend. Just encourage him to grieve however he is comfortable with and just remind him of all the great times.
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Old 07-02-2016, 08:46 PM   #15
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Sorry for your loss. Will pray for you.
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