Lies and Deceit - It's What This Trip Was Built On (A CLT Report) - UPDATED 3/9 About This Page:

[MickeyMAC]

Great update Karen. Sure glad your lost luggage finally made it..........I don't think $50 a day would buy very much. I do believe you ladies had too much fun at 1900 Park Fare. Looking for more interesting adventures.

[tammyd_rn]

Karen as usual a hilarious update. Thank you for sharing. I am so glad you found a soul sister in Anastasia(even if I did have to look up erudite). I have to agree with Colexis Mom about walking around the GF in a thong and only one sock. They might think you are from the GF campground after all. But maybe if you wore two socks that might overlook it. Just an opinion that is all.

[jhoshowski]

A wonderful update, as usual. And after the trip you have had so far, should your bag be tagged anything BUT Priority?!?!

[travismom]

Great update, Karen!!! Love the priority luggage tag!!

Can't wait for more.

[Bellaciavo]

Oh my goodness, I don't know whose report is funnier, if I'm ever at WDW the same time as CLT don't be surprised if you find me stalking you all.

[lindawdw]

I'm so glad your luggage showed up Karen because $50 a day would not have gotten you more than a shirt at the Grand Floridian! What a fun time was had at 1900 Park Fare. Loved the banter between you and the characters!

[DrDolphin]

Great update!! Your bonding with Anastasia - I can so see that! Glad the bag arrived - the thought of the thong and the sock.... well - not exactly GF if you know what I mean.

[DyanKJ130]

Poopypants!! More please

[Jillybean]

I think you've hit upon something - - maybe 50's Primetime Cafe should host a villian character breakfast - - they already have attitude there, so why not just throw in a couple of "meanies" to back it up.

I am having the best time imagining you sitting at the pre-K table enjoying your after dinner drink. And multiple glasses of wine followed by an after dinner drink. I'm just saying.

Jill

[emtpej]

LOL, LOL, ROFL! ROFLMAO! Gotta love the 'Steps'!

[KandJluvdisney]

great update karen
glad you got your priority luggage - yeah
and that you were able to form a bond with anastasia
hurry back with more please

[GoofyMom]

Love Anastasia, love poopypants, love sand-spitting-dismount hammock man! I'm in shock that the airline would expect you to find clothes for $50 at WDW! One stinkin' little rainstorm (little? ha! I went from dry to drowned rat in 2.7 seconds) in MK cost me $100 to get dry clothes. I'm glad you didn't have to try to wardrobe shop for that paltry amount or we may have got to see some interesting photos in later CLT TR installments.

[PrincessSharon]

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

Actually, the it's-ok-to-laugh-at-strangers-as-long-as-their-family-laughs-first rule is one of the reasons I try to stay out of public with MY family as much as possible. Granted, maybe I should work on not giving them so much material to use. But, still.

Unfortunately, you travel with us, your Disney family, so you're out of luck.

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

We were seated in the very back room, almost an annex, really, of the main room. Suspiciously, it was close to the same location we'd been seated in when we came for breakfast in December 2006 (when the CLT was first born.) It's like they knew. Odd... I will point out, however, that when Eileen and I came in June 2006 with our boys, we were seated smack dab in the middle of the restaurant just by the buffet. So, let's blame it on Sharon, shall we?

I think it's much more likely that they recognized the two of you from that June 2006 visit and seated us accordingly!

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

You can only imagine after our experiences with the step-sisters how we were feeling about little miss Cinderella. She's lovely, but by this point I was feeling like Anastasia and Driscella were just horribly misunderstood and Cinderella was the prettier girl who was always taking my, I mean their, man. For you country music fans, Cinderella is Taylor Swift and the step-sisters are Miranda Lambert. I don't believe that Cinderella ever had Teardrops on her Guitar, because she's never wanted a guy who didn't want her. Wheras, I totally believe that the step-sisters may have had to use their fair share of Kerosene, burning through the homes of all the boys who jilted them. I am clearly a Miranda Lambert kind of girl.

OK, I'm not a country music fan at all and have no clue what you're talking about, but I'm still laughing. How can that be?

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

Poor Cinderella, for just as she was leaving our none too friendly table, her step-mother was rounding the bend and requesting that she go clean something. Lady Tremaine was in purrrrfect character. She had no time for our autographs and pictures, and only approved of Eileen because she wasn't fumbling with her camera. When she did pose with us, some random guy got up from the table near us and tried to get in our picture. We all slowly turned in unison. And what was the look on our faces? Bingo! Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot. The man shrugged and said, "You're going to have to explain me to someone anyway." Ummm, seeing as we will never see you again, nothing is going to happen between us ever, and you're not adding anything photogenic to the shot, no, we won't. And, here is where Lady Tremaine won me over. Without a word, she turned to weird man, shooed him away with her hand, turned back, raised an eyebrow, and drawled, "that.. was.....oddddd." I totally need to go out drinking with Anastasia and Driscella and have Lady Tremaine running block. Love her too!

I don't even know where that guy came from! Definitely odd!

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

We each grabbed our after dinner drink of choice and headed to the table in the corner with the optimal view of Epcot. Unfortunately, there were only four big people chairs and than an adjacent table in the kiddie section. Of course, I got stuck in the kiddie chair. I don't know why. I guess they're just jealous of me because I'm the prettiest... and the most humble.

Or maybe you're just slow.

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

These kids were adorable, but the two boys were having a little too much fun teasing the one girl with them. The piece de resistance in their mockery came when one of the boys whispered to her, "Poopy pants." The little girl immediately called her mother over to tattle, "He said poopy pants!" That was it. I was done. I sat there shaking in my chair laughing over poopy pants. And you know what I said about returning to childhood at that moment? Forget it. I'm just immature. Because sitting here now, I'm still laughing at poopy pants. Poopy pants. Still laughing. High brow, ain't I?

Well, I don't even claim to be high brow, so

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

We were probably in bed about 10:30, and I was probably asleep about 10:31. The day (and night before) had really caught up with me and I crashed, until, that is, my phone rang at 9:46 PST with a call from Zack wanting to chat. I got off the phone quickly enough, said, "Goodnight Poopy Pants" to Sharon and Eileen, and went right back to sleep. What a day!

Did that actually happen? I guess I slept through the whole thing.

[chezp]

Sounds like you guys had a lot of fun at 1900 Park Fare - we are going to have to go back there to experience the step sisters for ourselves. They sound awesome! Loved the hammock story as well...

[Caldercup]

Let me just preface this by saying that I know I've found my soul sistahs in Sharon and Karen because I'm tempted to basically quote and comment on BOTH of their ENTIRE posts regarding this recent update. I love these two ladies!!

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

We knew that Leslie (WDWfan) and her mother-in-law, Mitzi, were having tea that afternoon, so we furtively scanned the patrons at the Garden View lounge to see if we could spot them. We figured nothing went better with relaxing and classy high tea than a visit by the loud and obnoxious CLT. Obviously, Leslie had briefed Mitzi on the CLT because her re-coil action was much less noticeable than what we typically get.

Heeee! This was the moment that I felt, for the first time, this "500 pound gorilla" that our being called the "CLT" has become. Seriously, Lesley and especially Mitzi, reacted like we were some three-headed celebrity gorgon. We weren't Karen, Sharon, and Eileen. We were
(DAH, dah, dummmmmm) the CLT...

Lesley was just as warm and friendly in person as she is on the boards. I felt an instant kinship with her. Mitzi was a delight and her adoration of her former daughter-in-law speaks volumes of how wonderful Lesley is as a person.

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

Now, the CLT is nothing if not well versed on public humiliation etiquette....

Why do you think we like hanging out together? -- 1) we all love to laugh, 2) we love to laugh with each other, and 3) we love to laugh at each other. But, is there any question what our most special and perfect laugh opportunities are? -- Stupid guest tricks!!

The guy in the hammock won the trophy for that day.

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

We stopped along the way to get a group shot in front of the Christmas tree, and I think said picture sits on the purported Photopass CD that Eileen supposedly purchased. But, I haven't seen any pictures from it yet. Sharon hasn't seen any pictures from it yet. Have you all?

How 'bout I blame it on my MS....?

Actually, it's trapped on the CD and I can't access it through my laptop because the CD drive has died. (That's why you guys haven't gotten the other CDs I've been promising for the past year!) Bob is trying to make our network drive work so I can get it all through there. Patience, grasshopper. Patience!

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

The only kink in the plans was that my luggage still hadn't arrived... <snip... By this time Eileen and Sharon had had far too much wine to be sympathetic. Plus, Eileen rationalized that with the way everything had gone so far, things were bound to work out.

It's amazing how I didn't hear an "Eileen, you were sooooo right." In fact, I might quote Lady Tremaine and go so far to say that the shocking lack of "Eileen, you were sooooo rights" seemed a bit ... odddd.

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

We were seated in the very back room, almost an annex, really, of the main room. Suspiciously, it was close to the same location we'd been seated in when we came for breakfast in December 2006 (when the CLT was first born.) It's like they knew. Odd... I will point out, however, that when Eileen and I came in June 2006 with our boys, we were seated smack dab in the middle of the restaurant just by the buffet. So, let's blame it on Sharon, shall we?

I think I'll throw myself on the grenade on this one and blame it on the grape-throwing incident from our first breakfast, Karen. I'm pretty sure that Sharon is blameless on this one.

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

I can't tell you anything about our server. Don't remember her (although I seem to recall prolific amounts of iced tea.) I can't tell you about the food. Don't remember it.

Our server was very competent in the plate-clearing and drinking-refilling skill set. She also appreciated that we'd rather see the Steps and Lady Tremaine that the "insipid" princess and prince.

The food... meh. It was not great, IMHO. But I was also viewing it through an afternoon of imbibing on the lovely zin that flowed for free in the Concierge lounge. So, the pastas, chicken and sides at the buffet just didn't have much appeal. I think I'll go back again when I'm less lubricated to see how I react to the food before I poo-poo it totally.

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

Now, I'm not one of those people who has a favorite character that I just love. Eileen, Sharon, Tiff, and Dawn can tell you about this tingle they get when they see their one and only. It doesn't bother me that I don't feel it, it just gives me more ammo to mock them.

Tingle? I think that's a mild description of what happens to us when Goofy, Minnie, Tigger and Eeyore are present. (I'm reminded of the physical damage almost done to me when I inadvertently got in front of Dawn when Eeyore flung his arms open to her...)

Electric shock, lightning strike, loss of any semblence of adult composure.... these are the things we deal with. Am I right?

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

It's just that my 35-years of experience had made me uniquely qualified for this moment. After decades of experience being scorned by men not as wise as Jerry, I was finally with my soul sisters. ...<<snip>> And, Anastasia was in my favorite stage of all: knowledge of your superiority over the clearly inferior being that you were formerly wasting your time pining over. She was through with Charming. ...<<snip>> .... Anastasia and I were going to be good, good friends.

I think that whoever took this pic is going to be my new best friend -- delicious!!

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

You can only imagine after our experiences with the step-sisters how we were feeling about little miss Cinderella. She's lovely, but by this point I was feeling like Anastasia and Driscella were just horribly misunderstood and Cinderella was the prettier girl who was always taking my, I mean their, man.

Totally lost me on the country music reference, Karen, but an old college friend once put the same sentiment into musical theatre vernacular for me: "the soprano always gets the man. For ONCE, I'd like to see the alto get to steal the show and exit stage right with the cute guy."

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

I clarify all of this to justify the wee bit of mocking we might have done at Cinderella'e expense. We acted demure to her face, while giggling in our napkins. Tiff and Dawn nicely asked for her autograph, while we rolled our eyes. We posed like sacharine princesses, while Cinderella gave us a tight little smile and dreamed of getting back to the little girl tables where she was beloved.

I think she heard me mutter "insipid" under my breath once or twice. (I blame the free wine from the concierge lounge. ) I think she was also offended by the great delight we took in Anastasia's loud exclamation that Cindy is actually a bottle blonde.

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

If only we could swap out Cinderella and Charming for Cruella and Ursula, it'd be golden.

OMGosh... I don't think I'd eat anywhere else if they offered that meal.

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

...a magical transformation took place as I sat in the minature chair. It was a combination of lack of sleep, that one last cocktail, and sitting with my knees tucked up under my chin, but I was transported back to childhood, and all relationship to maturity went out the window.

And **how** is this different that any other day at Disney? Your reaction to "poopy pants" was about equal with how we laughed at Hammock Guy. I'm just sayin'...

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

I was greeted by a glorious sight.



I have to point out that it says "Priority."

The moment I saw that tag, I knew this would be your comment on it. You can actually see my shoe (the lovely Froc that caused my image-smashing fall early that day) in the shot -- and I know I was standing there, giving you a hard time for photographing that tag.

Originally Posted by zacksmom_1993

I got off the phone quickly enough, said, "Goodnight Poopy Pants" to Sharon and Eileen, and went right back to sleep. What a day!

Totally not surprised that Sharon doesn't remember this. The Princess and the Pea falls asleep mid sentence if you turn off the light once her widdle head is on her widdle Princess pillowcases.

Fun, fun, fun. Can't wait to read more!
Eileen