Family Saga About This Page:

[snoozy]

Well as everyone knows by now I just went through a family crisis that was extremely stressful. So here is the low down on what happened.

Some background first. My mother's oldest sister passed away Nov 2002. She was married to my DU for 42 years. He was devastated when she passed away. Not two months later he met a woman about 15 years younger then him and she latched onto him. No doubt because he had a fat wallet.
His close friends were concerned about him and did not trust this woman because it was to soon after my DA passed and because he was an emotional mess.

Me and my two kids met this woman June of 2003. All three of us observed some very unhealthy behavior on the part of this woman. She was calling my DU the pet name my DA use to call him. She basically took over my DA car. She made a shrine in one of the bedrooms to my DA. She was sleeping in my DA bed, so on and so on. 3 days before we left she was moving her stuff over and officially moved in with my DU after we left. Now my DU was a devote Catholic. This woman was not and was not devorced from her second marriage. All of you Catholics out there will know exactly what this means.

So by the end of the summer my DU had sold his house and moved away from all his close friends of 50 years to an island that is part of the Gulf Island.

Before he moved I would call at anytime and if he was there he would always talk to me, if he was not there I would leave a message and he would get back to me. Well now when I call he is never home. I know now that she was screening his calls.

DU kicked her out of the new house officially Aug of 2004 because of several reasons. But he told everyone it was because of her 16 year old son. They would remain friends. We all now know that he was in a very abusive relationship with this woman and he was the one being abused.

At the end of Oct DU was diagnosed with termanal cancer. His prognosis with treatment was two years. At this time he changed his Will and added the evil one to it leaving her a very large sum of money.

By Dec 2 he had taken power of attorney away from the evil one because he finally was waking from his denial of the abuse. Well the treatments did not fair well with him by Dec 15 he was on his death bed.

On Dec 21 his sister came to stay with him. The evil one was exteremly rude to her and my DU and my DU's live in nurse. The evil one became abusive physically to the sister and the nurse and began behaving violently by throwing and breaking glasses and dishes. The police became involved. My DU begged his sister to tell everyone exactly how the evil one really is.

The evil one has keys to my DU house so the nurse and sister were very frightened of her. My DU passed away Dec 24th. I was unable to get to his home until Dec 26 and walked straight into this mess.

This horrible woman has no concience and is completely immoral. I did not meet one person who had anything nice to say about her. DU's sister is thinking about contesting the Will. Legally she is the only one who can because she is the closest blood relation.

I had to ride on the ferry back to the mainland with the evil one for the funeral. She was telling me how she wants to travel, how she wants to spend the money, how she needs to meet someone special her own age, all the time pretending that she is grieving over my DU death. The poor man was not in his crypt yet and she is talking this way.

Why did I put up with it. Well there is over 100 years worth of my family left in my DU's house. And the Will says that I receive these things. She has a key to the house so I guess you could say I was protecting the families interest.

At the funeral she of course sat in the front pew. But I made sure there was a big space between us. I was on the other side of the room and never spoke to her until the end at the reception.

The family has voiced to the executor that the locks on the house need to be changed. Once that happens everyone will feel more at ease.

It was 10 days of hell. But I came through it and I am a much better person then she could ever be. I behaved civily and with dignity, which she did not. She will get her up comings in the end and I hope she chokes on it.

I'm so happy to be home with my family. And will be back in my normal routine on Monday. After probate I go back to get the stuff and then I will tell her what everyone really thinks of her. Until then I have to have faith that it will all be ok.

Thanks for letting me vent and being there will all you support, PPters are the best there is.

[LizardCop]

[GATechGal]

Oh Susan. How awful! I'm sorry about the money, but at least you are going to be able to preserve your family's treasures. I'm surprised that the locks didn't get changed the first time that person started showing back up. If she wasn't living there and didn't have power of attorney any more, she really didn't need keys to get in. Good luck and keep us posted.

[chezp]

How terrible for you Susan. Please keep us updated with what happens. I hope you get everything you are entitled to and best of luck to your sister.

[whoSEZ]

Susan -- lots more coming your way. I'm sorry for your family's loss.

[Tara O'Hara]

Wow, Susan! More and on the way! I hope everything works out okay and that you are able to enjoy memories of your Uncle peacefully. I am truly sorry for your loss.

[goofy4goofy]

Gosh, I'm so sorry. I'm sending you a ton of pixie dust.

Kelly

[Colexis Mom]

Sending you tons more pixie Susan

[kncrafts]

Susan,
I know what your going through. My DH'S family is going through a similar promblem. So i'm sending you plenty of pixi dust!

[MickeyMAC]

[ QUOTE ]
Susan -- lots more coming your way. I'm sorry for your family's loss.

[/ QUOTE ]

Good luck Susan...your in our thoughts.

[BritDisFan]

I'm really sorry to hear this Susan , please let us know how you get on.

Karen

[snoozy]

Thanks everyone you guys are great. As for why the locks didn't get changed this is the big questions. The intire situation is very messy and complicated. I know if I had been able to get up there sooner I would have been able to talk my DU into doing it.

I knew before I got there things were not right, you know those gut feelings you get.

Almost as soon as he met her he started dropping all his close friends for 50 years and moved to the island. Plus things like I would call and always get the answering machine. At one time this last summer before he kicked her out of the house. I tried calling him for almost 2 months always leaving a message and never getting a return on them. This was very out of character for him. I now believe she was screening the calls and erasing the messages. It wasn't until I got up there and all of my gut feelings had been confirmed. It was a classic case of abuse. The abuser isolates the one being abused from family and friends. The one being abused makes up excuses and denies what is happening.

Anyways I know he is a peace now with my auntie. The rest will sort itself out. The evil one will get her up comings and hopefully she will choke on it.

Thanks again everyone your support is very much appreciated.

[Irene]

please keep us posted