Kids Stealing Food About This Page:

[TuffyCO]

I need some advice. My DS9 is high-functioning autistic and is constantly stealing food, mostly sugary foods. In the last week, he has snuck and eaten 15+ boxes of Girl Scout cookies that I had in the freezer. He sneaks them into his room, eats them in his bed and this morning I found a package of Samoas in the shower (the plastic tray with the 6 cookies left in it, full of dirty shower water, ick!). He has also taken chips, candy, frosting, ice cream (out of the container with his fingers), if I make a pie or cake he will eat whatever is left when no one is looking (also with his fingers). He has also been caught eating out of the sugar jar, which I then have to throw out the sugar. He also sneaks cheese, bread, chips and some other things as well.

I have thought about getting locks on everything, but I get so frustrated with everything being locked up. I already have to lock up the Wii, DVD player, TV remotes, iPhones etc. because he sneaks out in the middle of the night to play or watch tv and I feel like I'm running a prison.

We have healthy foods available all the time and he likes fruits and will often eat these as a snack, but then later takes a box of cookies. Often he doesn't eat very much at meal times, and this has been normal for him since he was little. He will eat very little one day and then a ton the next. But now I'm suspecting that his lack of appetite is due to his sneaking candy and treats.

We do offer treats daily. We usually give the kids a few cookies each day, or a bowl of ice cream after meals. When we go to the store we pick up candies. So it isn't like he never gets them. He never asks for any treats or candy (unless we are at a store), he doesn't ask me if he can have a few cookies or ice cream or whatever. We offer them in the evening, before and often he sneaks them after bed. My DD also sneaks some, but not very often and I would consider hers a little more typical, taking a few cookies when no one is looking. Not multiple boxes per day.

I've talked to our doctor and they really just said to lock the stuff up. I just can't stand having locks on everything, and I feel he has to learn how to control his own eating, locking it up will I'm afraid just make things worse.

We have caught him stealing from stores a couple times - mostly when he was much younger (4-5) and I think only one time was food. The other was products. We made him return the items and apologize for what he had done. This seems different, like he's driven to eat sugar. I don't believe he has stolen anything from a store in several years, I could be wrong, but he doesn't hide things very well. I'm really grossed out by the whole thing as we recently moved to NM and live in a rural area. We have had a mouse in the house (I think we are rid of it) and we have had a few centipedes (which totally freak me out). So I don't want food in the bedrooms and crumbs all over that would attack mice or bugs (that would attack centipedes).

I'm just wondering if anyone with neuro-typical kids has this problem or if this is stemming from his autism. Also, any suggestions on what to do would be great.

Thanks for letting me vent.

[DsnyDiva]

Stop purchasing the sweet food's for a while only keep healthier choices in the home. Maybe his taste's bud's will come to enjoy the fruit's over the sweet's eventually. I wish I had other advice...

[TuffyCO]

Originally Posted by renbugs

Stop purchasing the sweet food's for a while only keep healthier choices in the home. Maybe his taste's bud's will come to enjoy the fruit's over the sweet's eventually. I wish I had other advice...

I should have mentioned that we have tried that. We have gone long periods of time without any snacks in the house. We made a point to have desserts only at restaurants and would get small individual packages of cookies or treats sometimes when we were out. As soon as we buy a tub of ice cream, or I bake a cake he will start eating it all again. The funny thing with the Girl Scout cookies is they have been in the freezer since April and none started disappearing till a couple weeks ago. But then he just pigged out on them. We have been opening a box or two here and there over the months.

The other reason I don't want to just get rid of it, is because my DD12 gets very upset that she never gets any treats because when she asks, it is already gone.

[Tonichelle]

Originally Posted by renbugs

Stop purchasing the sweet food's for a while only keep healthier choices in the home. Maybe his taste's bud's will come to enjoy the fruit's over the sweet's eventually. I wish I had other advice...

That was my first thought, it may not be fair to others in the house, but it's better than what you've got right now.

[TuffyCO]

Thank you everyone for all of the great info! I think I really needed to vent and get my head on straight. All the suggestions have helped me think through many different things. I am looking into ways to lock up the cabinets/freezer as I think this is the easiest quick solution, and that way he "has" to ask for treats as otherwise he cannot get to them.

Originally Posted by feonag

Maybe he needs harder consequences for he actions. My niece is autistic and my sister punishes her if she does something wrong because as you said he knows what he is doing is wrong. The trick with every kid is to find what works the best. What does he like to do the best? Take that away from him for a month and go from there. You might have to be a bigger shadow on him too. Make sure you know what he is doing at all times, if he walks into the kitchen you follow him to see what he is doing. Good luck.

I've tried punishing in every way imaginable, no Wii, tv, take books, Legos, toys, we have even emptied his entire room. It just seems that with the tv/Wii sneaking and the food sneaking no amount of consequence stops the behavior. It's like he is driven to do it, even though he knows he will get in trouble. Shadowing may be an important step.

Originally Posted by GingerJ

I just did a quick search on autism and binge eating, and found several hits. You might do that if you haven't already...one source says that ASD kids often have obsessions and overeating can be one of them. So you might try treating this as an obsession, because the extent really sounds obsessive to me, a total layperson though I am; I'm thinking you might already have some experience in this area, as it appears to be a not-uncommon problem. One source that looks really good: Dietary management for children and adolescents with ASDs: over-eating - | autism | Asperger syndrome |, and then follow the link on the left-hand side about obessive behavior.
(My direct experience with ASD is limited, but one of the boys in my Cub Scout den has Asperger's, so I've looked into it just a little for that reason, to help me understand him and deal with his own dear personality a bit more effectively.)

Good luck!

Ginger

Thank you for the link. I looked at it a little, but will have to delve in a little deeper. It does seem to be more of an obsessive thing, even the tv and Wii are that way. He goes to great lengths to sneak out and watch tv or play Wii when he is not suppose to and no amount of consequence has worked. We took the Wii and DVD player out of the room and locked them up for a month and then he would sneak our cell phones or onto the computer or would find the keys to the room they were in and we would catch him at midnight playing. I don't feel that it is clear cut that he is misbehaving knowingly, even though he knows what he is doing is wrong. It's more like uncontrollable behaviors, that he knows are wrong but still has to do, even if it means getting into trouble. It does sound obsessive when I say it like that. Not sure if that makes any sense.

Originally Posted by DisneyDana

I agree. Another thing, are you sure he's not diabetic? My step son was 9 when he almost went into a diabetic coma while visiting his over indulgent grandparents that thought it was "cute" that he ate 5 bowls of sugary cereal before bed one night. Come to find out he had juvenile diabetes and has been on insulin ever since. He tends to like anything sweet be it candy or sweet potatoes. I'd have him checked for sure because 15 boxes of cookies could kill him if he is and doesn't know it.

Second, I'd try to figure out why he is deliberately ignoring your rules and correct that behavior obviously. That's no fun to deal with at all.

We did have him tested for diabetes the last time went went through this. It's funny that it seems to go in spurts. Of course that could be because I stop keeping the food in the house and then we start adding some back in, which ends in him sneaking the food. At that time he had no medical concerns. He is a very healthy weight, and does eat a lot of fruits, meats, grains. We have finally gotten him eating some veggies, this was a tough one but he now eats broccoli, carrots, peas, green beans and bell peppers. We are working on salad, but he doesn't like any dressing (and we have tried a lot) and even I think salad is kind bland with absolutely nothing on it. I will definitely keep an eye on things and talk to the doctor again if things don't improve with some structure and locking the cabinets. Thanks!

[TuffyCO]

Originally Posted by DisneyDana

I WISH I liked salad with no dressing! lol

Me too!!! I love dressing!

I can't figure out why he doesn't like any kind of salad dressing. Aren't kids suppose to love Ranch at the very least?!?!?!

[Pax]

Originally Posted by TuffyCO

Me too!!! I love dressing!

I can't figure out why he doesn't like any kind of salad dressing. Aren't kids suppose to love Ranch at the very least?!?!?!

Maybe it's a texture thing?

So .. have you tried those bacon-crumbles, maybe some grated cheese, and so on? You know ... basically, a kind of dry salad dressing ...?

[mechurchlady]

You need to find out if he is hungry. If I was a hungry kid I would take things that I could eat on the run like a finger full of ice cream or a bag of cookies. Autistic kids have a higher rate of SID/sensory issues. Each tiny part of their body can be over, under or normal. Some kids are under sensitive in their stomachs so that they cannot tell that they are full. Others are over sensitive and barely eat. He might not feel sated and you can tell this by the quantity of food he eats.

It is rare but he could have pica. People with pica crave something so much that they will eat large quantities of that item. It is obvious that he has a need to eat not just steal. Another thing you mention is that he is not hiding the evidence. I used to take candy from my grandmother's fridge and I would hide the wrappers. Based on my experience I feel that your child is taking the food to sate a need in his body. He does not see the stealing as being wrong. It is more like someone has gone to the fridge and taken food then left the wrappers on the floor.

Make a log of everything he eats and drinks. It is an allergen log that tracks movement, food, drink, and anything else that may cause a person to act in odd ways. Such logs have helped people pinpoint allergens or other problems.
There could be something that you are missing that is causing this behavior.

You can try switching real food with food doused in pepper sauce or other edible but yucky stuff. I would not have stole anymore candy from my grandmother if the candy tasted like vinegar or hot peppers. This could give you clues. A pleasure seeker might put down the food while a child who is hungry would keep eating. Then there are the documented cases of sleep eating that you can look into. A sleep eater will eat cat food, vinegar, or rotten food without knowing they got out of bed and raided the fridge.

[joelsmom]

Originally Posted by TuffyCO

Me too!!! I love dressing!

I can't figure out why he doesn't like any kind of salad dressing. Aren't kids suppose to love Ranch at the very least?!?!?!

My DS, now 16, has Asperger's. Thankfully we haven't had your issue. After reading through all of the posts so far, like it or not, I think you need to lock everything up. You certainly seem to be a great mom. You already do so much for him. I know psychologists advise us to find the child's motivator, but as a mom and a teacher, it's been my experience that that's easier said than done. Plus, you've already tried a lot of those things. So, I'd say lock up the food.

I know with my DS I've had to occasionally have a conversation about trust and how important it is...and that it's a two-way street. He trusts me to take care of him and do what's best for him. I don't let him down, and conversely I want and need to be able to trust him too. Maybe you could explain it to your DS in that way as you put on the locks.



By the way, my DS hates salad dressing too, even ranch. I am constantly trying to get him to try new foods. He's so picky!

[TuffyCO]

Originally Posted by joelsmom

My DS, now 16, has Asperger's. Thankfully we haven't had your issue. After reading through all of the posts so far, like it or not, I think you need to lock everything up. You certainly seem to be a great mom. You already do so much for him. I know psychologists advise us to find the child's motivator, but as a mom and a teacher, it's been my experience that that's easier said than done. Plus, you've already tried a lot of those things. So, I'd say lock up the food.

I know with my DS I've had to occasionally have a conversation about trust and how important it is...and that it's a two-way street. He trusts me to take care of him and do what's best for him. I don't let him down, and conversely I want and need to be able to trust him too. Maybe you could explain it to your DS in that way as you put on the locks.



By the way, my DS hates salad dressing too, even ranch. I am constantly trying to get him to try new foods. He's so picky!

Thank you, there are definitely days I don't feel like a great mom, but then I regroup, rethink and start over. It's especially hard because after the kids were diagnosed and I started learning and reading about all of it, I came to realize that I am probably on the far end of the spectrum. I have OCD tendencies, become easily overwhelmed, don't do very well in social situations and become easily frustrated. Having them has taught me a lot and it has pushed me out of my comfort zone in many areas.

We have the trust conversation almost daily. The biggest one is brushing his teeth, which he hates to do. He was doing really good for awhile and I stopped sitting in the bathroom with him. Then we went to the dentist and the dentist said it didn't look like he was brushing, I found out he wasn't using toothpaste only water for a minute. So I had to start watching him again. He was so angry, but I explained that he broke our trust. He doesn't like me "watching" so I read a book while he brushes and watch him from the corner of my eye. I guess it will be the same conversation about locking up the food.

The funny thing with foods, is my kids are really eclectic eaters. They eat tons of things that I know many kids wouldn't try. I actually thank our Disney trips for that. We have different "Disney Rules" than some rules at home and one is if you order something at a restaurant you never tried before and don't like it, we will get you a burger or something from a QS restaurant. We did this when we had the dining plan and often had a couple QS at the end of the trip we had to use, so it wasn't really a concern about money (and in fact we have never had to buy a burger). They have tried many new things including salmon, fish, shrimp and more. DS tried calamari when we went to DL in February and now orders it as his meal many places. But he just doesn't like salad dressing and DD does not like cheese. Oh and they are picky that they don't like things mixed, i.e. They want an ice cream sundae with chocolate (DD is no chocolate), no whipped cream and cherries on the side (don't like the cherry juice mixed with the chocolate, but like cherries). But they like whipped cream on key lime pie?!?!?! They confuse me and often times waiters/waitresses.

[TuffyCO]

Originally Posted by HiddenMickey

You mention punishments fir bad behaviors. Do you reward good behaviors? My kids responded much better to reward than punishment when they were young. Make sure you Let him know when he's doing things right too.

Oh yes, we reward good often. I don't reward with food or treats though, as I think that sets a bad example. But we reward with praise, Wii time, tv, games etc.

Originally Posted by Pax

Maybe it's a texture thing?

So .. have you tried those bacon-crumbles, maybe some grated cheese, and so on? You know ... basically, a kind of dry salad dressing ...?

If we do that he would eat the bacon-crumbles and cheese and leave the rest.

Originally Posted by mechurchlady

You need to find out if he is hungry. If I was a hungry kid I would take things that I could eat on the run like a finger full of ice cream or a bag of cookies. Autistic kids have a higher rate of SID/sensory issues. Each tiny part of their body can be over, under or normal. Some kids are under sensitive in their stomachs so that they cannot tell that they are full. Others are over sensitive and barely eat. He might not feel sated and you can tell this by the quantity of food he eats.

It is rare but he could have pica. People with pica crave something so much that they will eat large quantities of that item. It is obvious that he has a need to eat not just steal. Another thing you mention is that he is not hiding the evidence. I used to take candy from my grandmother's fridge and I would hide the wrappers. Based on my experience I feel that your child is taking the food to sate a need in his body. He does not see the stealing as being wrong. It is more like someone has gone to the fridge and taken food then left the wrappers on the floor.

Make a log of everything he eats and drinks. It is an allergen log that tracks movement, food, drink, and anything else that may cause a person to act in odd ways. Such logs have helped people pinpoint allergens or other problems.
There could be something that you are missing that is causing this behavior.

You can try switching real food with food doused in pepper sauce or other edible but yucky stuff. I would not have stole anymore candy from my grandmother if the candy tasted like vinegar or hot peppers. This could give you clues. A pleasure seeker might put down the food while a child who is hungry would keep eating. Then there are the documented cases of sleep eating that you can look into. A sleep eater will eat cat food, vinegar, or rotten food without knowing they got out of bed and raided the fridge.

I know he is not eating it because he is hungry. When he's hungry he will come tell me he's hungry and ask what he can eat. This always happens late in the evening, after I've put him to bed. He is actually hiding the evidence, he's just not very good at it. Like hiding the package of cookies under a wash cloth in the shower (BTW - Girl Scout Samoas in nasty shower water smell awful, yuk!) or empty boxes under his pillow. I do think he is filling a need, I just don't believe it is hunger.

I am fairly certain it is not Pica as it is not consistent. It seems to happen for awhile and then stops for awhile. The cookies had been in the freezer since April and he only started in on them a couple weeks ago. It almost like he felt no one else was eating them that he should. We have been pulling a box every week or so, but I could see him rationalizing that they were just sitting there so therefore he should eat them.

I may have to do a food log again. I did this in the past because we were concerned as he would skip many meals and we thought he was filling up on treats. When we did the log we found that he has very unusual eating patterns. Day 1 and 2 he may only eat an apple, a chicken nugget and a slice of bread each day. Day 3 he would eat 4 eggs, toast, 15 chicken nuggets, meatloaf, veggies, 2 apples and a piece of cake. But over the course of a week or two if you logged all the food he was eating in a graph, he was eating an exceptionally balanced diet. This was a few years ago and we stopped worrying about what he was eating, but he didn't seem as focused on sugar as he is now. So a food log may be necessary, but I will need to have the food secure so he can't get to it.

I ordered a key for the freezer today and am working on trying to find a way to lock up at least one pantry.

[mechurchlady]

Hiding the food indicates he knows he is doing something wrong which is good news. Since this is off and on I think there is some hidden trigger. It might be emotional eating where he gets stressed out to the point that he grabs snacks at night to relax. It would be nice if you could get paid for having this mystery, it is a hard one for sure.

to me it is lookling like hunger, cravings, or something triggered by an emotion or stress. For me sweets and chips are comforting food that boost my happiness level. When I am stressed all I need is a handful of potato chips or a few jelly belly candies. Since you cannot sit there all night watching the fridge you have to get a guard dog or locks. Do not feel bad if you have locks as the locks are there for his safety and show you love him.

Sending you hugs and prayers

[TuffyCO]

Originally Posted by mechurchlady

Hiding the food indicates he knows he is doing something wrong which is good news. Since this is off and on I think there is some hidden trigger. It might be emotional eating where he gets stressed out to the point that he grabs snacks at night to relax. It would be nice if you could get paid for having this mystery, it is a hard one for sure.

to me it is lookling like hunger, cravings, or something triggered by an emotion or stress. For me sweets and chips are comforting food that boost my happiness level. When I am stressed all I need is a handful of potato chips or a few jelly belly candies. Since you cannot sit there all night watching the fridge you have to get a guard dog or locks. Do not feel bad if you have locks as the locks are there for his safety and show you love him.

Sending you hugs and prayers

Thank you for the prayers and hugs. It would be nice to get paid for a lot of what we go through. I am just thankful that my DH does well enough that I can stay home with the kids.

You made me think of something that could be the trigger. I have done a lot of research on kids and sugar. I found that sugar does not make the child hyper as everyone use to think. However, it does cause them not to be able to focus or concentrate (especially kids with AD/HD or other neurological disorders). We avoid feeding sugary foods during the day and give the treats in the evening before bed (kids don't need to focus and concentrate while they sleep). I'm wondering if as he is getting older if he subconsciously realizes that if he eats sugary foods that it will calm his brain. He is highly intelligent and his brain never seems to stop. Maybe it is a self-regulation to help him calm down. Maybe I need to increase the portion size (or sugar content) of the desserts and treats I give him at night and see if that helps him. Kind of a backwards thought but who knows.

[trixiedixie]

Originally Posted by TuffyCO

Thank you for the prayers and hugs. It would be nice to get paid for a lot of what we go through. I am just thankful that my DH does well enough that I can stay home with the kids.

You made me think of something that could be the trigger. I have done a lot of research on kids and sugar. I found that sugar does not make the child hyper as everyone use to think. However, it does cause them not to be able to focus or concentrate (especially kids with AD/HD or other neurological disorders). We avoid feeding sugary foods during the day and give the treats in the evening before bed (kids don't need to focus and concentrate while they sleep). I'm wondering if as he is getting older if he subconsciously realizes that if he eats sugary foods that it will calm his brain. He is highly intelligent and his brain never seems to stop. Maybe it is a self-regulation to help him calm down. Maybe I need to increase the portion size (or sugar content) of the desserts and treats I give him at night and see if that helps him. Kind of a backwards thought but who knows.

I think you are on to something - these kids are often more attune to their sensory needs than others - or maybe the needs are more extreme, but I know that if certain things aren't the way I am used to a switch can flip and things can be thrown off in a hurry....

For ideas on guarding the food as you work on self regulation/ self control as you are doing - check out Prader -Willi support information. Prader Willi is a syndrome where the kids NEVER get the signal they are full! So in the younger years esp it is all environmental control and controlling access vs. teaching regulation - that comes later. I know a lady who has to lock EVERYTHING bc of it.

I love the far you are in tune with the fact he will have to learn the skills to choose well, that is missing in a lot of parents these days! LOL!

[TuffyCO]

Originally Posted by HiddenMickey

Is there any way that you could rearrange your kitchen so that the bi-fold door closet isn't used for food and you move the food to cabinets that you can lock? It may not be ideal, but I can't think of a way to lock that type of door that a preteen wouldn't figure out.

Not really. We have one "pantry" in the kitchen and one in the dining room. This is an old house and it has the worst storage space I have ever seen. Two of the five bedrooms don't even have closets. But it's on 44 acres along a river so it's worth it. The one in the kitchen we customized for our pots, pans, etc and it would be too difficult to change that. The other is the bi-fold door. I may be able to clear a shelf in the kitchen pantry and put a lock on that door, but if I can find a way to lock the other it would be preferable.

Originally Posted by Tonichelle

That was my first thought, it may not be fair to others in the house, but it's better than what you've got right now.

I really can't do this to my daughter, locking it up is probably better. We live about an hour from the nearest grocery store. There is a gas station in our town and a small store, but things there are super expensive, so only in an emergency. My DD is also on the spectrum and gets very, very angry when she is forced to lose something because of her brother. So I definitely need a place I can keep the sweets for the rest of the family. I'm dieting and honestly would prefer to keep them out too, but I like a treat now and then as well.

Originally Posted by Papa Mouse

You mentioned that your doctor did a test but in a rare instance did he do the right test?

Possibly a complete blood test could find this lacking substance or chemicals. Do you know if the doctor took a blood test and how many vials? A complete blood test will take more than a couple vials. With a complete blood test the results might lead to the cause or a malfuntioning gland that can be corrected through medication. You might ask your doctor.

We did have a full panel done. He was admitted to the inpatient/outpatient neuro-psychiatric care unit in Denver last June and part of that is checking every possible medical concern. They check for everything. The only area of concern was his iron level was slightly low and that has been taken care of. If this keeps up I may have that checked again, just to make sure.

I will also try some Lite salad dressings. I don't know what it is he doesn't like. He uses ketchup, BBQ sauce and seafood sauce but that's about it. He doesn't like any other kind of sauces/dressings. But we will keep trying. It may be something he won't enjoy till he is an adult.

Originally Posted by GATechGal

Again throwing in my 2 cents to ease your mind...my DH, and now my DS and sometimes my DD all like to eat salad with no dressing. Go figure. I can't eat it that way, and they will eat salad out with dressing. But most nights at home they eat it just plain. Even spinach salad. Go figure. And they are really not condiment eaters either. So let him eat that salad nekkid as long as he'll eat it. I'd be thrilled if my DS16 would eat peas and green beans and enjoy them. Now he just chokes them down because they're on his plate and if he want's seconds of anything else he has to eat firsts first.

That's the thing is he won't eat it plain either. He will eat the carrots but not the lettuce. He tried the lettuce and didn't hate it, just said it was boring. I just think if he found a dressing he would actually like it.

Originally Posted by JoanneS

I think the suggestion about the hardware store is the way to go for the cabinets. They don't need to know why you want to lock your cabinets. If you're looking for a fridge lock, I found one online on a marine supply store. We've been using them for years and they work out great. Try this link Refrigerator Locks. This is how we keep people from stealing wine out of the fridge at work.

I will check the hardware store next time I head to town and see what they can suggest. I would love to be able to use a combo lock so I don't have to carry a key around. The freezer is not so bad as I only need it when I get meats or ice cream out. I still think I'll wait on the fridge lock as there isn't a lot in there for him to sneak that isn't healthy and I don't mind him eating that. But I will keep that link in case it becomes a problem. That would definitely work.