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Old 04-08-2012, 06:42 PM   #1
disneymom1035
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Help!!! Daughter wants to go???

My 19 yr old daughter has been on and off the fence with going on the cruise with DH, Me, DS 6, DS 18? She currently lives at home, but her boyfriend and her are talking about getting an apartment or living on campus, So Im not sure about paying for her to go, plus it cuts close to school getting out in 5/2013

We have a stateroom that we really like and don't want to lose in order to add a 5th person, So I don't really know how to go about adding her to our reservation or maybe we should add an inside stateroom or something? (actually I think all insides are sold out) Ugh, don't know what to do!

Those of you with wishy washy 19 yrs old college girls, please help!!! Would you add her or just say NO! She keeps saying the ships scare her? Then she seems jealous when we look at the ship??? I feel bad but we don't even know where she will live in a year?
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Old 04-08-2012, 07:59 PM   #2
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That is a really hard situation. I don't know what I would do in your situation. I guess you know your daughter best. I wish you luck.
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Old 04-09-2012, 10:06 AM   #3
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A second stateroom may work best. On the Dream and Fantasy, the price of a Cat. 9 is little different than the price of an inside room, thanks to those cool Virtual Portholes for the inside room. Book it for your DD alone, for now - you're quite a way from the full payment due date, so you have lots of time to adjust or even cancel - for now it'll just be the deposit on the line.

A year from now, will your DD and her current DBF even be together? You can cross that bridge later, too. How you may arrange who's in which stateroom can also be done later - no need to change your room or its booked occupants if you don't know what the future will bring.
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Old 04-09-2012, 02:55 PM   #4
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BF

Thanks Dave!

As for wether or not my daughter and her boyfriend will still be together..... Im guessing they will be together due to the fact that they have been together for 6 YEARS already, LOL They have been together since they were 13 and in 7th grade! They now go to the same college and are connected at the hip, we already consider him a part of the family and like a son! So it's a pretty safe bet! lol
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Old 04-12-2012, 12:41 AM   #5
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Since, sadly, the "7 Year Itch" is now a little less than 5, I think they're going to make it.
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Old 04-14-2012, 02:12 PM   #6
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I would book the inside room for her and as you get closer transfer one of the other children to that reservation so that you don't pay the single passenger surcharge.
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Old 04-14-2012, 11:05 PM   #7
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You have made your plan and your DD chose not to be included. Stand by this and continue to plan your life with her moving to her own place. You can always tell her she has to book and pay for herself and let her see the cost (I bet she stays home then-lol).

My family is in the same situation - next July we have booked a Mediterranean disney cruise and my DS will be 16.5. He did not want to be away from his friends or part time job for the 3.5 weeks we will be away. So we didn't book for him. He is going to be home alone! When the rest of the family discuss the trip he feels sad and left out but that was his choice.

For the record by July 2013 my DS will have stayed home alone for varying lengths of time whilst we vacation, 3 or 4 times. He is left with a full fridge/pantry, money for emergencies and fresh fruit and the house lights on timers so he never goes home to a dark house.

At 19 and with a serious partner I would be leaving your DD to make her own bookings and payments. Good luck.
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Old 04-14-2012, 11:22 PM   #8
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[QUOTE=Tigger71;3923854]You have made your plan and your DD chose not to be included. Stand by this and continue to plan your life with her moving to her own place. You can always tell her she has to book and pay for herself and let her see the cost (I bet she stays home then-lol).
/QUOTE]

There was an item on, I think Marketplace Money, about kids not really understanding what college cost, and that the day they get accepted is "just a tad late" in starting that discussion. I know I didn't have any real comprehension on what college was going to cost, and back then and expensive semester was $500 for tuition and fees and such at a state school. Now it's closer to $10,000. And lots of kids have their hearts set on one of the expensive "prestige" colleges.

Getting a real fix on "the real world" early enough on can sometimes save a person's life. Not as in "living on" but as in "getting a life."
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Old 04-18-2012, 11:05 AM   #9
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Update!

Thank you for all your advice! We will not be taking our DD on the trip

We are not pleased with some choices that she is making and we are done playing games with her! In short.....

DD doesn't have a car (had one and it died) She has been driving the wheels off of mine, which needs to last me a while longer. We offered her our tax money so that she could get a 2011 Toyota Carolla, that would last her many yrs to come. She claims she doesn't want a high car payment of $200/month (not high for DD who has no expenses, and has 2 jobs) She wants to buy a piece of junk off craigslist, so we tried to persuade her and no go, so we told her we are not spending $1000 on junk, and so now the money is going to house repairs as originally planned! Needless to say things are a little tense between us, but we feel she is making poor choices!
What we really think is going on is... She plans on getting an apartment with the BF and that's why she views $200/month "high" so since we don't believe in just handing over cars to any of our 4 adult and teen children, we have reversed the offer and she has had to resort to public bus and rides from the BF and friends!!!
Tough lessons to learn, but you can't refuse help and still drive my car into the ground!
So that situation helped "clarify" the whole vacation issue, LOL
They all have to learn somehow!
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