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The OUCH phase of OH, I GET IT!

Posted 10-06-2009 at 04:17 PM by Sandra Bostwick
Updated 10-08-2009 at 10:23 PM by Sandra Bostwick
A big part of my job is to create suffering.

That's a pretty harsh thing to say, but it really is true. A good therapist or teacher knows that, for most people, ouch is the stage before growth or learning.

Sometimes I need to learn my own lesson.

Let's take a simple example, which would be learning how to upload photos from my digital camera to place them in an online trip report. Luckily, there are step-by-step instructions here, but it still took a little mental muscle stretching to find the instructions and follow through.

I remember when I was trying to create photo albums on my home page a while back, and I gave up. This time, though, I'd said I would post photos by Friday for my project, so I worked through it.

I don't think I am any smarter now, so why did I do it? Because I just accepted the ouch phase of my project.

Are you putting off something you could be doing because of the ouch factor?

When I help students work through the ouch factor, I become a magnet for all sorts of negative emotional ammunition.

I assure them that they can do it. I praise them for little steps. I might give little hints, but never the answer. And I NEVER back down unless I know I'm about to go too far.

But, too often, when I am working on my own goals, I feel the burn of ouch inside my brain and I pull back like I've touched a red hot poker by mistake. In some situations, like posting my own photos online, I just give up.

I give up and lose out.

Any goal that matters is going to have some ouch in it.

Learning something new... pushing with exercise... giving up something that is not healthy for something healthier... doing those unpleasant little tasks like making sure you understand changes in the tax codes before you file...

OUCH OUCH OUCH OUCH!

But only if I push through "ouch" can I reach "I get it!"

If you are working on a project with us, do you have any ouches? How do you deal with them?
0 Pixie Dust
Posted in Walt's Wave
Views 2485 Comments 6 Email Blog Entry
Total Comments 6

Comments

  1. Old
    Nimros's Avatar
    Your job seems to be to inspire me daily - and now you're forcing me to look at my 'ouches' and move through them.

    My "ouch?" Just getting started. It's painful to make yourself take that first step. I'm not through it yet. I'm still sitting here thinking, "this is going to hurt."
    0 Pixie Dust
    Posted 10-06-2009 at 08:30 PM by Nimros Nimros is offline
  2. Old
    GoofEme's Avatar
    My ouch turned into an OUCH yesterday, because of avoidance. DS recently had an accident, he was okay, but totalled his car. He is in college, a commuter, and had his car registered with campus safety, etc... The day following the accident he started driving DH's car and mentioned he need to go get it registered. I said, (ouch because of time, money, stress from wreck etc...)we'll do that in a couple of days, surely it'll be okay for a couple of days. Well, the next week (last week) he got the flu, well my mind is in overdrive and I'm feeling overwhelmed. I Forgot about the registration with campus safety and he did too. He got a ticket yesterday from campus safety..$25 and the threat of being booted if he doesnt get it done before they see him again. OUCH.
    0 Pixie Dust
    Posted 10-07-2009 at 08:38 AM by GoofEme GoofEme is offline
  3. Old
    Sandra Bostwick's Avatar
    Those are two powerful ouches!

    The ouch of getting started is a big one for me. It is wierd because, most of the time, once I get started, the momentum keeps me rolling, bit I resist. The classic body at rest remaining at rest...

    The other ouch, the ouch of juggling too many balls until one hits you in the head, is a big one for me also.

    I think that is why I benefit from discussions like this. You have to hug your demons, or they'll bite you in the &$^%(*!
    0 Pixie Dust
    Posted 10-07-2009 at 10:10 PM by Sandra Bostwick Sandra Bostwick is offline
  4. Old
    christiejay's Avatar
    This is not exactly what you're talking about, but I go through the ouch phase with Joshua every day with his homework. Don't know when it will sink in for him ... read the directions on the worksheet ... check your work ... etc.
    0 Pixie Dust
    Posted 10-13-2009 at 07:09 PM by christiejay christiejay is offline
  5. Old
    Sandra Bostwick's Avatar
    That is actually EXACTLY what I'm talking about! I go through that ouch phase with my students all the time until the insight sinks in.
    0 Pixie Dust
    Posted 10-14-2009 at 12:08 AM by Sandra Bostwick Sandra Bostwick is offline
  6. Old
    Sandra Bostwick's Avatar
    I just went through this BIG TIME! sometimes_you_complain.

    There were some upgrades made to the server which made my previously OK photos too large. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I spent several hours working in Paint to resize them, something I'd never done before.

    I was not getting anywhere fast, so I walked away for an hour or so. When I came back the job was tedious, but managable.

    That was a major cerebral ouch, but SO worth it once I got it. That is exactly the type of process that I would have given up on not too long ago.

    I have to be honest, though, and say that if Lizardcop had not posted such clear directions as a stickie, I am not sure if I could have done it.

    So, thank you Lizardcop, and thank you blog, for making me accountable to my goal of finishing that first Trip Report, even if the method changes somewhat.
    0 Pixie Dust
    Posted 11-01-2009 at 09:36 AM by Sandra Bostwick Sandra Bostwick is offline
 







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